New Jersey: Politics Unusual

Redistricting Commission Unveils Twelve New Congressional Districts that All Look Like New Jersey

2011-12-22T00:32:00.001-05:00

“…this type of redistricting is much easier in “squarer states like Kansas.”

The game of musical chairs that is congressional redistricting progressed late into tonight, with the apparent focus remaining on the elimination of one of three districts in the northeastern part of the state.

But as the third day of meetings continued, there was finally a vote on a new map to reduce the number of New Jersey’s congressional districts from 13 to 12 as mandated by the 2010 Census.

“The new map has twelve districts that all have the shape of New Jersey,” noted former state Attorney General John Farmer, the independent appointee who would have had to cast a tiebreaking vote if necessary.

“And while the Garden State population outside of those Jersey-shaped areas will have no representation in Congress, the map does look much nicer this way.” Farmer also pointed out that “there was none of the usual gerrymandering” that accompanied re-districting in the past.

The chairman of the Republican team, Mike DuHaime, a longtime political strategist, confirmed that this was the “best compromise we could come to…”.

“I think there’s been good progress on both sides. It’s been an open dialogue both between the two sides and with (Farmer),” declared DuHaime. Former Assembly Speaker Joseph Roberts, who is leading the Democrats, agreed. “It’s been intense but somewhat collegial,” mentioned Roberts.

According to the National Commission on Congressional Management, this type of redistricting is much easier in “squarer states like Kansas, Colorado or Wyoming, but tougher in New Jersey.”

Cherry Hill Man Believed He Had To Turn The Clocks Back One Hour Each Weekend

2011-11-07T09:13:00.001-05:00

“He was always an hour early to every painting job we hired him for.”

Cory Brodsky, a self-employed house painter, since early June of 2008 firmly believed that “the law required us to turn back the clocks one hour each weekend at 2 AM”.

“I have been doing this ever since the third weekend in June 2008, when I moved out from my parents into my own apartment in Cherry Hill. I thought it was the grown-up thing to do to follow the law, and now I find that I’ve been doing the wrong thing,” noted Mr. Brodsky, with a confused look on his face.

Daylight saving time in several countries is the practice of temporarily advancing clocks during the summertime so that afternoons have more daylight and mornings have less.

Mr. Brodsky, up until this past weekend, was of the mistaken belief that the actual date was October 10, 2010, obviously the effect of turning back the clock one hour each weekend for almost 3 years.

“I have been writing the wrong date on checks. Since I work for myself I didn’t really have to be anywhere more or less on time,” added Brodsky.

However, Brodsky will have trouble adjusting to losing more than a year of his life. “It’s been really weird––over the past year, for me the World Series was in February, Christmas really was in June. The only holidays that seemed to be at the right time were the Jewish holidays of Shavuos and Lag B’Omer––which tend to move around anyway.”

On the bright side, there were some advantages to his mistake. “He was always an hour early to every painting job we hired him for,” said Mrs. Mona Jane Dudek, a 73-year-old resident of Evesham Township, “and he always finished way ahead of schedule.”

New Jersey To Issue Its Own Currency? Springsteen And Sinatra To Appear On New Paper Money.

2011-10-29T12:26:00.001-04:00

From www.whatexitnj.com:

“My personal favorite for the One Hundred Dollar bill is Joe Piscopo.”

“Everyone agrees that Jerry Lewis (of Weehawken) or Lou Costello (of Paterson) should be on the One Dollar bill,” said Assemblyman Michael Patrick Carroll, sponsor of bill A-1776. “And that either Frank Sinatra (of Hoboken) or Bruce Springsteen (of Long Branch) should be on the One Thousand Dollar bill.”

Carroll is the main sponsor for legislation, A-1776, that would “…immediately initiate, create, fashion and grant authority to the state of New Jersey to print monetary paper currency to be valid for all debts public and private for the state there in.” The bill is cosponsored in the State Assembly by fellow legislators Allison Littell McHose (NJ-24), Erik Peterson (NJ-23), and John DiMaio (NJ-23). The same legislation is sponsored in the Senate by Senator Michael Doherty as S-117.

“The Obama administration has so devalued American currency, by its failed economic and fiscal policies, that this is the best a state can do,” noted Carroll.

Under Article I Section 8 of the Federal Constitution, Congress has the authority to:

“To coin Money, regulate the Value thereof, and of foreign Coin, and fix the Standard of Weights and Measures; To provide for the Punishment of counterfeiting the Securities and current Coin of the United States.”

One would think that this alone would deter Assemblyman Carroll, ––– however he claims that “Article I Section 8 merely refers to ‘coin money’, and not paper currency.”

“In an originalist interpretation of the Constitution, as the Founding Fathers would have us interpret the document, there is no mention of ‘paper money’ – just ‘coin money’ ”, noted Carroll.

“Obviously, the intent of the Framers was to leave this to the Several States, under the 10^th amendment––which says ‘The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the States, are reserved to the States respectively, or to the people.’ The Founding Fathers clearly had it in mind for states to issue their own paper currency. It is only liberal activist courts that have subverted this Original Intent.”

Additionally, under A-1776, “An exploratory New Jersey Currency Commission shall be set up in the following manner: Two members shall be appointed from the general public by the governor; Two members shall be appointed by each house of the legislature; and the Seventh member shall be the Chief Justice of the New Jersey Supreme Court, unless he is a ‘liberal’, whereby the governor shall have the power to appoint his own additional nominee subject to the advice and consent of himself.”

The New Jersey Currency Commission shall have the power to decide which persons, living or dead, will appear the on the various denominations of the paper money.

“There are those liberals who have their favorites; Princeton is lobbying for Woodrow Wilson or Paul Robeson. My personal favorite for the One Hundred Dollar bill is Joe Piscopo. That ‘I’m from Jersey’ bit from 1980s SNL still cracks me up,” finished Carroll.

New Jersey Plan to Make Money With Formula One Grand Prix: “Charge Tolls”.

2011-10-28T16:59:00.001-04:00

“E-Z Pass is a remarkable toll collection technology that makes race car driving more convenient.”

Governor Chris Christie announced this week that in 2013, there will be a Formula 1 Grand Prix race in New Jersey. The plan includes the cooperation of the mayors of Weehawken and West New York, two cities geographically involved in the circuit’s layout.

However Mayors Richard F. Turner of Weehawken and Felix Roque of West New York, both had the same concern, “How does New Jersey make money on this?”

“Tolls. And the sale of E-Z Pass to Formula One Grand Prix top drivers, of course. We have already received E-Z Pass applications from Ferrari’s Felipe Massa, and Mercedes GP star Michael Schumacher, as well as several other top drivers,” added Christie.

“E-Z Pass is a remarkable toll collection technology that makes race car driving more convenient, and will help Formula One drivers save money through discount plans offered by many toll facilities. It will reduce traffic congestion for everyone in the race,” noted New Jersey E-Z Pass Director Jorge Ramon Caceres.

Both Massa and Schumacher expressed concern that, “Having to stop every eight miles or so, and find change to pay a toll,” might impede their ability to be competitive.

“New Jersey remains a leader in hosting all types of national and international sporting events,” Governor Christie said, adding the Grand Prix of America to a list that includes last winter’s NCAA tournament and the Super Bowl in 2014. “While some pure race drivers will opt out of E-Z Pass , it is there for those drivers who wish to take advantage of the time savings it provides.”

World champion Sebastian Vettel, was equally impressed with the challenge of racing in New Jersey.

“It’s interesting, a good challenge,” said Vettel. “It’s very dusty to start with, but the track seems like it will be a new type of challenge…especially the toll lanes that give a lot of options to all the drivers. ‘Exact Change Only’. ‘E-Z Pass lanes Only’. ‘Cash Only’. Toll-operators in case drivers need directions. We’ll see a good race in 2013.”

Placing a race in New Jersey, on a 10-year contract, “will be one of the best decisions you ever made.” Gov. Christie also said he is interested in bringing NASCAR to the track

Congressman Leonard Lance Replaced With Evil Twin Right Wing Cousin “Cubby Lance”...

2011-06-05T10:11:00.004-04:00

June 5th, 2011:

Congressman Leonard Lance Replaced With Evil

Twin Right Wing Cousin “Cubby Lance”

Washington, DC: It has been determined through carefully DNA screening, that moderate Republican Leonard Lance, has been replaced by his Right Wing/Tea Party evil twin cousin, “Cubby Lance”. This is from a source deep inside the Lance Congressional office, who needs to remain anonymous, and is known only by the name ‘State Street’.

“Meet Leonard, who's been in NJ everywhere,
From Trenton town to Hamilton Square.
But Cubby’s only sees the sights.
A guy can see from Extreme Right --
What a crazy pair!”, offered ‘State Street’.

The Star-Ledger first broke the story at the end of May, (Tom Moran’s “The Curious Transformation of N.J. Congressman Leonard Lance”), but did not reveal the reason why Lance seemed to ‘transform’.

Where former State Senator Lance was pro-choice, Congressman “Cubby” Lance has voted to de-fund Planned Parenthood; where former State Senator Lance was a solid supporter of senior citizens and Medicare, Congressman “Cubby” Lance has voted with Paul Ryan to destroy Medicare.

“But they're cousins,
Identical cousins all the way.
One pair of matching bookends,
Different as night and day,” continued ‘State Street’.

“Where Leonard always votes for pro-choice,
Supports Medicare, and has a moderate voice;
But Cubby votes with his Right-wing Chair
loves the Tea Party, against health care;
What a crazy pair!” shared ‘State Street’.

“You can lose your mind,
When cousins are two of a kind.”

There was no immediate comment from the Republican National Committee, or from New Jersey Republican Chairman Samual S. Raia as to when the real Leonard Lance would return to Congress.

March 1st, 2011: Rep. Jon Runyun beats "Toaster Oven" in Jeopardy! Challenge

2011-03-01T13:21:00.005-05:00

Republican New Jersey Rep. Jon Runyan was the sole competitor to beat the Sanyo SK-7W Toaster Oven (nicknamed "Toasty") in a mock Capitol Hill exhibition of "Jeopardy!" Monday night, beating out House Speaker John Boehner, Rep. Michelle Bachman (R.-MN), and Eric Cantor (R.-VA.), and Kevin McCarthy (CA-22).

Cantor and Bachman scored no points at all: Cantor could not figure out how to use the buzzer system and Bachman looked into the wrong camera throughout the Jeopardy! Challenge.

Sanyo hosted the Washington event -- a non-televised, informal game of Jeopardy -- to demonstrate the impact of kitchen technology on society, according to the Hill.

"Toasty", Sanyo's interactive toaster-oven, is equipped with some of the most sophisticated heating coils in the world.

"I am not surprised Toasty lost; it is not an American made product. A Black and Decker toaster oven would have been tougher," Runyan said, according to the Hill.

Toasty was unable to answer a question about the Dred Scott Supreme Court decision, but Runyan knew the answer from his debate with former Congressman John Adler. "Luckily, I still had that answer written on my hand," shared Rep. Runyan.

In other news, Gov. Christie told the Star-Ledger that he was upset that Charlie Sheen was "stealing my signature ranting and yelling bit. That is my bit, not his."

February 22, 2011: Gov. Christie to hold “Turn Back The Clock!” Counter-Rally with Republican electeds

2011-02-22T09:07:00.005-05:00

As Charles Wowkanech, New Jersey State AFL-CIO President, joins a furious clan of Wisconsin workers who will travel to Trenton this Friday who say the time is now to rally for collective bargaining rights, Gov. Christie will hold a counter rally on the Statehouse steps with Wisconsin Republican Governor Scott Walker.

Christie and Walker will be joined by dozens of other Republican elected officials from around the nation at their "Turn Back The Clock!" Rally. "The time is not 'Now'; the time is 'Then'. It is time to turn back the clocks," asserted Walker in a media release.

Wisconsin Gov. Walker, who wishes to turn back the clock on public union labor's right to collective bargaining, will be joined onstage by New Jersey Congressman Chris Smith, who wishes to redefine the legal definition of rape, turning back the clock on the right to womens' productive freedom; Missouri State Sen. Jane Cunningham, who's introduced a bill to turn back the clock on child labor laws; and newly elected Kentucky Sen. Rand Paul, who earlier last year expressed his wish to turn back the clock on civil rights by declaring that the Civil Rights Act of 1964 was "unconstitutional".

"This is who I am!™," began Gov. Christie with his now famous trademark phrIase. "Last year in New Jersey, and last November, the American people elected Republicans to turn back the clocks. To turn back the clocks on collective bargaining for unions. On environmental protection. On abortion rights. On child labor laws."

Public workers say 'the time is now'. Well, we say the time is 'then'. Now is the time to turn back the clock to 'then'. At this rally, we will stand shoulder to shoulder in solidarity with our fellow Republican electeds across the nation and speak out to support their right to turn back the clocks.

Christie issues Executive Order “terminating New York Mets basebal

2011-02-17T15:01:00.001-05:00

News shocker: February 17, 2011

New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie issues Executive Order “terminating New York Mets baseball season as of February 18 due to the ongoing baseball season crisis”.

Against the objections of New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg, New Jersey Gov. Christie Christie issued Executive Order No. 41 officially terminating the New York Mets baseball season as of February 18th. However, the New Jersey governor may have overreached his authority this time.

“The governor of New Jersey has no authority over the New York Mets, as they are geographically domiciled in Queens, with their principal place of business being in New York City. If anyone has the authority to put the team out of their misery before the start of the baseball season that would be me is the mayor of New York,” said Mayor Bloomberg in a statement to the press. The New York mayor was still considering all options at this time to deal with the impending Mets baseball season crisis. Governor Christie defended his actions, “ I am a lifelong New York Mets fan, and it pains me to have to take this action. But the families of New Jersey come first, and must be protected from the ongoing baseball crisis.”

Teams scheduled to play the Mets will receive “a half a win for each game that was to be played”, said Major League Baseball Commissioner Bud Selig.

The exact wording of Executive Order No. 41, in part:

WHEREAS, the last time the New York Mets were in the World Series was 2000; and

WHEREAS, the New York Mets finished the 2010 season with a winning percentage of just .488, in fourth place; and

WHEREAS, the New York Mets finished the 2009 season with a 70-92 record, finishing in 4^th place in NL East; and

WHEREAS, the New York Mets finished the 2008 season with a 89-73 record, finishing in 2nd place in NL East; and

WHEREAS, the USA Today's sports section last week touted the Phillies' pitching staff as “one of the all-time bests…”NOW, THEREFORE, I, CHRIS CHRISTIE, Governor of the State of New Jersey, by virtue of the authority vested in me by the Constitution and by the Statutes of this State, do hereby ORDER and DIRECT:

1. A state of baseball emergency exists with regard to the New York Mets ‘professional’ baseball team by reason of the facts and circumstances set forth above.

2. In light of these facts and circumstances, I hereby order the termination of the New York Mets baseball season as of Friday, February 18^th 2011;

3. Furthermore, I order all pitchers, catchers and all other baseball players currently contracted to perform professional athletic services for the New York Mets to return home to their families until further notice, and cease and desist from any and all spring training activities at this time.

4. Mets manager Terry Collins is hereby ordered immediately to cease and desist from any and all managerial, directorial, coaching and other leadership activities.

4. This action is taken to ensure that the families of the New York/New Jersey metropolitan area are in no danger of seeing something offensive to the sensibilities of the ordinary baseball fan.

AP Newswire Trenton February 4, 2011: New census data: Hispanics the dominant minority group; number 2: Facebook-Americans.

2011-02-04T14:49:00.003-05:00

AP Newswire Trenton February 4, 2011: New census data: Hispanics the dominant minority group; number 2: Facebook-Americans.

New Jersey's population grew more racially and online-virtually diverse over the past decade and continued its shift to southern counties, according to new data released today by the Census Bureau.

The numbers from the 2010 Census provide a detailed portrait of the state's ongoing demographic changes, including population counts for all 21 counties, 566 municipalities.

Among the findings:

• Hispanics are now the dominant minority group in New Jersey after decades of sustained growth.

• However, the number of New Jerseyans who identified themselves as "FaceBook-Americans" rose 39 percent to roughly 1.5 million.

• Twitter-Americans were counted for the first time in 2010, and showed to be a growing virtual population at just under 3%.

• MySpace-Americans, once a dominant group in 2000, have dwindled down to .02% of the virtual population.

The Census information will be used almost immediately to redraw legislative districts in time for the November elections.

A man who identified as "BobinPJs" tweeted that the "rdstrictng plns in NJ n stp trtng us like r dnt exst."

The white population continued to decline in New Jersey, falling 1 percent to about 6.03 million. This is the second consecutive decade the proportion of white residents has fallen in New Jersey, which New Jersey State Tea Party chair Donald Bardus Swartz, of Teaneck immediately "blamed on the Jews."

In other news, Congressman Jon Ryan expressed concern that the new census data may cause New Jersey to lose several state legislative seats: "...now we have 40 state senators. This decrease in population due to having less people may cause that number to be 38 or even 35 by the time we're all done."

January 24-28, 2011: That Was New Jersey News That Was!

2011-01-28T10:55:00.005-05:00

January 24-28, 2011: That Was New Jersey News That Was!

* Congressman Jon Runyon of New Jersey's Third Congressional District:Rep. Runyon issued the following statement regarding President Obama's State of the Union address: "...first the president doesn't tell Congress who is coming from China, next none of the beer vendors at the speech ever made their way up to where I was sitting. And that was another thing, I have to sit next to "Democrats"---and the president used to many highfalutin' words. I mean--WTF?"
*N.J. bill aims to end nepotism at charter, public schools: "Though nepotism has been a way of life in some New Jersey school districts, there are signs that change may be coming," said State Sen. Randall "Randy" Stottlemyre (D-41). "This bill being considered by the state Assembly would prohibit the state's charter schools and 588 school districts from hiring staff who are related to the superintendent, a board member, personnel director, business administrator or the school district's attorney," added Middlesex County School Superintendent Martin "Marty" Stottlemyre. Woodbridge Township Superintendent John "Johnnyboy" Stottlemyre said "...the bill will not affect his school district because nepotism rules have been in place since at least 1992."
* Gov. Christie tells anti-abortion activists he is on their side during Statehouse rally: Gov. Chris Christie made brief remarks before hundreds who weathered bitter temperatures to mark the anniversary of the Supreme Court's decision in Roe v. Wade. Speaking for five minutes without a coat, Christie told the attendees that "every life is precious and a gift from God." In response, God issued the following statement: "First of all, I am a God of free will. Notice that I do not demand that People love Me or accept Me. I loved You first and allow You to make the choice to accept that love and to love Me back. Now that's Pro-Choice. Also, if you go outside in 0° weather, wear a coat for Me Sakes. You're the governor! First you go to Florida in a snowstorm--then you don't wear a coat when it's freezing out? What kind of example is that to set for New Jersey kids, huh?"
* North Hunterdon High teen breaks up mid-terms with disgusting smell:A 16-year-old Clinton Township boy faces disorderly charges for causing a disgusting smell in his classroom during mid-term exams at North Hunterdon High School. According to police, the teen was in class at North Hunterdon on Monday and asked to use the bathroom. The boy then took a carry-out style coffee mug with a screw-on cap with him to the nurses' office bathroom. The boy defecated in the mug, screwed the cap on, and returned to the classroom where he unscrewed the lid, and "this caused a disruption in the classroom," police said. The American Center for Law and Justice (ACLJ) which focuses on constitutional law for conservative issues, has decided to "defend the boy's First Amendment right to express his views in any way he so chooses. This is like the Tinker case all over again... only
maybe we can call it the Stinker case...".
ing, I have to sit next to “Democrats”–––and the president used to many highfalutin’ words. I mean––WTF?”

*N.J. bill aims to end nepotism at charter, public schools: “Though nepotism has been a way of life in some New Jersey school districts, there are signs that change may be coming,” said State Sen. Randall “Randy” Stottlemyre (D-41). “This bill being considered by the state Assembly would prohibit the state’s charter schools and 588 school districts from hiring staff who are related to the superintendent, a board member, personnel director, business administrator or the school district’s attorney,” added Middlesex County School Superintendent Martin “Marty” Stottlemyre. Woodbridge Township Superintendent John “Johnnyboy” Stottlemyre said “…the bill will not affect his school district because nepotism rules have been in place since at least 1992.”

* Gov. Christie tells anti-abortion activists he is on their side during Statehouse rally: Gov. Chris Christie made brief remarks before hundreds who weathered bitter temperatures to mark the anniversary of the Supreme Court’s decision in Roe v. Wade. Speaking for five minutes without a coat, Christie told the attendees that "every life is precious and a gift from God." In response, God issued the following statement: “First of all, I am a God of free will. Notice that I do not demand that People love Me or accept Me. I loved You first and allow You to make the choice to accept that love and to love Me back. Now that's Pro-Choice. Also, if you go outside in 0° weather, wear a coat for Me Sakes. You’re the governor! First you go to Florida in a snowstorm––then you don't wear a coat when it's freezing out? What kind of example is that to set for New Jersey kids, huh?”

* North Hunterdon High teen breaks up mid-terms with disgusting smell: A 16-year-old Clinton Township boy faces disorderly charges for causing a disgusting smell in his classroom during mid-term exams at North Hunterdon High School. According to police, the teen was in class at North Hunterdon on Monday and asked to use the bathroom. The boy then took a carry-out style coffee mug with a screw-on cap with him to the nurses’ office bathroom. The boy defecated in the mug, screwed the cap on, and returned to the classroom where he unscrewed the lid, and “this caused a disruption in the classroom,” police said. The American Center for Law and Justice (ACLJ) which focuses on constitutional law for conservative issues, has decided to “defend the boy’s First Amendment right to express his views in any way he so chooses. This is like the Tinker case all over again… only maybe we can call it the Stinker case…”.

2011-01-23T23:55:00.003-05:00

Wikipedia: Michelle Malkin is an American conservative blogger, political commentator, and author. Her weekly, syndicated column appears in a number of newspapers and websites nationwide. She has been a guest on MSNBC, Fox News Channel, C-SPAN, and national radio programs. Malkin has written four books published byRegnery Publishing.

We had the chance to meet at the RightOnline Conference in Pitttsburgh two years ago. Why bring this up now? Because when I was cleaning off my desk, I came upon some notes I had after we met. She is not the world's nicest person.

More Wikipedia: In 2004, she wrote In Defense of Internment: The Case for 'Racial Profiling' in World War II and the War on Terror, defending Japanese American internment by the United States government during World War II, and arguing that the same procedures could be used on Arab- and Muslim-Americans today. The book engendered harsh criticism from several Asian American civil rights organizations. The "Historians' Committee for Fairness", a group of professors, condemned the book for not having undergonepeer review and argued that its central thesis is false. It was announced in August 2004 that the Hawaii-based newspaper MidWeek dropped her column as a result of the controversy. Beginning in November 2004, this move was followed by The Virginian-Pilot, with criticism that she was "an Asian Ann Coulter".Malkin responded, "I'm not Asian, I'm American, for goodness' sake. I would take the comparison to Ann Coulter as somewhat of a compliment. I have a lot of respect for Ann Coulter."

Someone needs to tell Malkin that although she is an American citizen, her ethnicity would have landed her in a camp 70 years ago.

Runyan launching an investigation of Obama for refusing to "reveal who is coming from China".

2011-01-18T09:43:00.002-05:00

Janaury 18th, 2011: NJ 3rd District Congressman wants to know "Who's Coming to the US From China?"

Congressman Jon Runyan is launching an investigation of the Obama Administration for refusing to "reveal who is coming from China" for a state visit this week.

"The only thing I heard from the White House was a question, 'Who is coming from China?'. This administration needs to be more open with the American people regarding foreign affairs," said newly elected Congressman. "This is outrageous."

Last week, the Obama administration issued an update of the presidential schedule to newly elected House Speaker of the House John Boehner, and he passed the information onto Runyan in a phone conversation. We obtained the transcript:

Speaker Boehner: Hu is coming from China.

Rep. Runyan: That's what I want to find out.

Speaker Boehner: That's what I said: Hu is coming from China.

Rep. Runyan: Are you the Speaker?

Speaker Boehner: Yes.

Rep. Runyan: And you don't know this Chinaman's name?

Speaker Boehner: Well, I should.

Rep. Runyan: Well, then who's coming from China?

Speaker Boehner: Yes.

Rep. Runyan: I mean the fellow's name.

Speaker Boehner: Hu.

Rep. Runyan: The guy coming from China.

Speaker Boehner: Hu.

Rep. Runyan: The Chinese guy having dinner with Obama.

Speaker Boehner: Hu.

Rep. Runyan: The guy eating in the White House...

Speaker Boehner: Hu is having dinner with Obama!

Rep. Runyan: I'm asking YOU who's having dinner with Obama

Speaker Boehner: That's the man's name.

Rep. Runyan: That's who's name?

Speaker Boehner: Yes.

Rep. Runyan: Well go ahead and tell me.

Speaker Boehner: That's it.

Rep. Runyan: That's who?

Speaker Boehner: Yes.

PAUSE

Rep. Runyan: Does THIS guy have a birth certificate?

Speaker Boehner: I should think so.

Rep. Runyan: Who's having dinner with Obama?

Speaker Boehner: That's right.

Rep. Runyan: What's the Chinese guy's name on his birth certificate?

Speaker Boehner: No, Watt is the name of the Secretary of the Interior under Reagan.

Rep. Runyan: I'm not asking who served under Reagen.

Speaker Boehner: Hu never served under Reagen! I am telling you, Hu is the president of China!

Rep. Runyan: Look, All I'm trying to find out is the Chinese guy's name.

Speaker Boehner: Hu! Hu is the president of China! Hu is eating with Obama!

Rep. Runyan: Who is the president of China? Who is eating with Obama?

Speaker Boehner: That is the first intelligent thing you have said.

Rep. Runyan: I don't even know what I am talking about! If this guy leaves China, he leaves someone else in charge.

Speaker Boehner: I should say he does. A prime minister.

Rep. Runyan: Can tell me the name of the Chinese prime minister?

Speaker Boehner: Do want the name of the Chinese prime minister? Wen.

Rep. Runyan: You can tell me now.

Speaker Boehner: I will tell you: Wen.

Rep. Runyan: You'll tell me when?

Speaker Boehner: I just told you, Wen.

Rep. Runyan: Look, all I wanna know is who is the Chinese prime minister?

Speaker Boehner: No, Hu is having a state dinner with Obama.

Rep. Runyan: The dinner is for who?

Speaker Boehner: Right. Now you've got it!

Rep. Runyan: I don't even know what I am talking about! And this is taking too long.

Speaker Boehner: What did you say?.

Rep. Runyan: Long! Too long!

Speaker Boehner: Loong? Loong's the leader of Singapore! He's not coming to dinner!

Rivera-Soto Says He'll Abstain Only When The Court Is Divided Due To The ‘Voices’ In His Head

2011-01-13T21:40:00.001-05:00

January 14th, 2010: Rivera-Soto Says He'll Abstain Only When The Court Is Divided Due To The ‘Voices’ In His Head

Justice Roberto Rivera-Soto has modified his pledge to abstain from voting on opinions in protest of Appellate Division Judge Edwin Stern's temporary assignment to the state Supreme Court.

What has made him change his position on the issue?

"…a particularly sober, thoughtful, measured and ultimately persuasive analysis stands out, a voice that has triggered additional reflection on the course I earlier charted,” explained Justice Rivera-Soto. So, it was the ‘voice’ in his head that made him change his mind.

“Actually, there were seven voices. And the vote was 4-2, with one abstention,” continued the Justice who was nominated by Governor James E. McGreevey in 2004.

Henceforth, he'll only abstain when and if Stern's vote makes a difference. Essentially, when the Court is divided — he said Wednesday in a dissenting opinion in a land use case, Hopewell Valley Citizens Group v. Berwind Property Group Development Co.

“Also, when we are in a month with a R in it. And when there is a full-moon, and when a horse named for a Shakespearean character wins the third race at Monmouth Park,” added Rivera-Soto.

"When a justice's decision is based on hearing voices, it's time to go," said state Senate President Stephen Sweeney, “Although I do understand the voice in his head that abstained.”

Sen. Dick Codey added, “I must admit I underestimated Justice Rivera-Soto. I thought he could not make his tenure on the court any more bizarre or shameful. Today he proved me wrong…”

In related news, Rivera-Soto decided that he won't seek renomination, and said in a statement to Governor Christie, “Although the rewards of public service and, in particular, service on the court are many, it is time for me to return to my first and true professional love: the practice of law.”

Gubernatorial Spokesman Michael Drewniak issued a one-word response to Rivera-Soto: “Duh!

Governor's plan to help Gannett Layoffs: "Create less news...a government about 'nothing'."

2011-01-13T00:19:00.001-05:00

January 13th 2011:
Governor announces plan to deal with Gannett Newspapers Announced Layoff Plans:
"We plan to create less news. This will become a government about 'nothing'."

The Gannett Company, owners of the largest newspaper chain in the nation, announced staff layoffs in three daily New Jersey newspapers. The Gannett Company includes the Courier News in Somerville, the Home News Tribune of East Brunswick and the Daily Record in Morris County. Ninety-nine staffers at the papers will have to apply for 53 remaining positions which amounts to the elimination of approximately half the editorial staff. Gannett has sought assistance from the Math Department at Rutgers to determine exactly "what percentage of 99 is 53."

The Gannett Company, seeking assistance from the governor's office and the people of New Jersey, issued a request through the New Jersey Business Action Center for the governor to issue an Executive Order requiring "elected officials around the state to do less, maintain a lower rate of activity by at least 50%, and do 'less with less'."

The mayor of a small central New Jersey town, who wish to remain anonymous, said, "For years they've been asking us to do more with less; for a while we had to do less with more; and now they're asking us to do less with less-it's all getting very confusing."

"If we can count on cooperation of New Jersey's state senators, assemblyman, mayors, and locally elected officials to create less news by doing less in their communities, we can ride the wave of this recession by using fewer reporters to report the less news created," said George H. White, Executive Director of the New Jersey Press Association.

Both Gov. Christie and Senate President Steve Sweeney were ready to do their part: "... I am ready to do less about the financial problems facing New Jersey small towns and create less news," said the governor in a statement issued by spokesman Michael Drewniak.

"I am also ready to continue abstaining on important issues coming before the state Senate in order to create less news," said Senate President Sweeney. "Working together we can do less and less, so as to help the New Jersey newspaper industry to survive this recession."

In other news, JWoww of MTV's "Jersey Shore" (real name Jenni Farley) filed an Order To Show Cause in court in a bid to stop her former lover and manager from cashing in on nude pictures he had taken of her.

"I'd hate for such photos to destroy my pristine image," said JWoww.

December 30th, 2010: News Shocker: New Jersey To Eliminate Offices Of Governor And Lieutenant Governor

2010-12-29T20:17:00.001-05:00

December 30th, 2010: News Shocker: New Jersey To Eliminate Offices Of Governor And Lieutenant Governor

State Sen. Ray Lesniak is initiating legislation in the Senate that would eliminate the office of Lieutenant Governor and Governor, considering that “the state is working very well while Gov. Christie is in Disneyworld and Lieutenant Governor is in Mexico.”

Two years ago voters in New Jersey approved the creation of the lieutenant governor position as an amendment to the New Jersey Constitution, and Republican Kim Guadagno was elected.

Amongst the powers designated to the lieutenant governor under Article V, Section I, paragraph 6 of the New Jersey state Constitution, is the requirement that the lieutenant governor “…stand directly behind the current governor, smiling, as he or she signs or vetoes bills; leave the state of New Jersey to go on vacation when the governor does; cut ribbons at the openings of state parks or the closing of tunnels or bridges…”.

But not everyone thinks that Kim Guadagno is doing her job.

"We clearly made a mistake if we created the office lieutenant governor and wasted money if the lieutenant governor is not going to be here when the governor is out of state," said state Sen. Raymond Lesniak (D-Union). "It's being handled very well by Sen. Sweeney, but you have to really question the purpose of the office."

And a noted New Jersey academic questions the need for the transition of power, and maybe even the need for is the office of governor itself. “The requirement, in an era of instant communication, only adds to political complications when passing down powers”, said Joseph Marbach, a Seton Hall University political science professor. "It's really an antiquated policy. He's not out of contact with people, particularly because of technology," said Marbach, who is dean of the College of Arts and Sciences. "This is a concept that is 200 years old and really doesn't make a lot of sense in the modern era."

In an era of blackberries, e-mail, cell phones and instantaneous communication––does it really matter if we have a governor at all? Maybe it is possible to outsource the needs of our executive branch to a state whose governor does not make as much as Christie does. Christie is amongst the highest paid governors in the nation at $170,000.

“When people run for governor, they know what the salary is,” said Ingrid Reed, political scientist at Rutgers University in New Jersey. “They’re not doing it for the money. They’re doing it for the power to do good deeds.”

“We’re trying to cut back in government spending, maybe it’s time to outsource the role of the governor to a state like Maine, where the governor is paid just $70,000. Or maybe outsource to Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger, who takes no salary at all. We can text message our needs to Arnold, and save a great deal of money in the process,” added Lesniak.

In other news, in Florida Gov. Christie was on YouTube yelling at Donald Duck declaring that he was “...unfit to teach values to our children because he wears no pants when he goes out in public.”

Happy Festivus, New Jersey!

2010-12-21T14:09:00.003-05:00

Happy Festivus, New Jersey!

It's that time of year again to get out your unadorned aluminum pole, and celebrate Festivus.

For those of you unfamiliar with the holiday of Festivus, "the holiday, as portrayed in the Seinfeld episode and now celebrated by many, includes practices such as the "Airing of Grievances," which occurs during the Festivus meal and in which each person tells everyone else all the ways they have disappointed him or her over the past year. After the meal the "Feats of Strength" are performed, involving wrestling the head of the household to the floor, with the holiday ending only if the head of the household is actually pinned.

And so, in the spirit of the holiday of Festivus, I share with you today how people in New Jersey politics have disappointed me over the past year 2010:

Gov. Chris Christie: How could anybody expect this Governor not to be on the list of any Democrat in New Jersey celebrating Festivus?

Losing $400 million in Race To The Top Funding. Vilifying NJEA. Yelling at teachers and reporters. Stopping the ARC Tunnel. List too long to list here. No wonder his tide is turning more than the Jersey Shore's.

Bear Hunters: What's the matter? Hunting and killing Bambi not macho enough for you? So, you need to go after Yogi and Boo-Boo?

State Senator Loretta Weinberg: For not getting elected Lieutenant Governor. I know it is heaven to have you in the Senate where you still give them hell. But, I know as Lieutenant Governor you would have done so much more than just look adoringly over the shoulder of the Governor as he vetoes bills.

Senate President Steve Sweeney: For his abstention on Marriage equality, and lack of leadership in general. Has not lived up to all the leadership hype as of yet, and is pale in comparison to his predecessor. Lots more will
be expected in 2011.

Assemblyman Alex DeCrocce: For his Scrooge-like opinion about the unemployed work force in NJ being lazy: ("I'm one of the few people here ... who feel that benefits are too good for these people,"). And he is the Co-Chair of the Bipartisan Leadership Committee? What a moron.

Wally Edge for revealing himself: This is a secret that would have survived just fine, like Dear Abby or the Dread Pirate Roberts.

The entire Republican Congressional Delgation from NJ: For being on the wrong side of history and not voting to repeal "Don't Ask/Don't Tell"---Including my own Congressman Leonard Lance. Land mines don't make distinctions based on sexuality and neither should you. Shame on you all.

The 44 folks indicted for corruption: The electeds and rabbis who went to trial this year did nothing to enhance the reputation of New Jersey corruption, and just served to help the folks who produced "The Soprano State" make some bucks.

Cast of "Jersey Shore", "Real Housewives of New Jersey": Not quite as bad as the Corrupt 44, but you are enablers of the Jersey jokes written for late night hosts Leno, Fallon, Letterman and Ferguson. Snooki, please go back to NY.

Statue of Lou Costello: For not coming to life and making us laugh all year. We needed some good laughs this year, and you were not on First.

Mayor Anna Little: For distorting Frank Pallone's record over and over again in your campaign for Congress. And for your wacky ideas on governance.

Future Ex-Congressman John Adler: For voting against the healthcare bill because he thought it would give him a win in the second term; and for having a hand (if true) in running a fake Tea Party candidate. While I was proud of State Senator Adler, Congressman John Adler disappointed me.

The entire New Jersey population at large: Over the last decade New Jersey's population grew, but at a rate much more slowly then either Texas or Florida. I am very disappointed that the New Jersey population could not distract itself more often from watching the Jets or Giants, reading the Star-Ledger or the Asbury Park Press or listening to Jon Bon Jovi or Bruce long enough to schtup more often to increase your numbers. Now the very Republican states of Texas and Florida will have more influence in Congress.

And I am sure you can add your own.

Now, on to 2011, and the Feats of Strength. Between being a legislative election year, and a year we lose a Congressman, we will need all the strength we can muster.

December 12, 2010: Sen. Bernie Sanders, Hero Extraordinaire and Mensch of The Year

2010-12-12T09:17:00.005-05:00

December 12, 2010: Sen. Bernie Sanders, Hero Extraordinaire and Mensch of The Year

Since1992, Bernie Sanders has been on my list of heroes along with such people as Ralph Nader, Thurgood Marshall, and my dad, Bernie Novick.

I first met Bernie on the streets of Burlington, Vermont ––when he was running for Congress early in the summer of 1992. I was up in Burlington, playing a comedy club and Bernie was campaigning on the streets of the town where he was Mayor from 1981 to 1989. He approached me with a big smile, and in his Brooklyn accent asked me where I stood on the issues impacting the state. When I told him I was not from Vermont but from Brooklyn, he chatted me up anyway.

I asked him for one of his campaign buttons for my dad–– (Bernie was so well known in Vermont that his button just had one word on it ––“Bernie”). I told him my dad was named “Bernie” and was also from Brooklyn, and he said to me, “Then he must be a good man!”

Years before, I had read about Bernie in a New York Times Sunday Magazine section article about the “only self-described socialist mayor in the United States”. The article went on to describe how Bernie had been born in Brooklyn, and moved to Vermont and ran for mayor and beat out more well-funded Democratic and Republican candidates. Through his success as mayor in revitalizing Burlington’s downtown and his personal popularity, he served several terms.

After meeting Bernie that summer in 1992, I decided to support him in his race for Congress. And so, I organized a comedy show benefit that included myself, comedians Scott Blakeman and Henriette Mantell. The Sanders for Congress campaign arranged a location at a club in Brattleboro for October 14, 1992 (which happened to be the night of the Gore quail Stockdale vice presidential debate).

Scott is a wonderful political comedian who has worked for free for good political causes for many years. Henriette is someone you may know from The Brady Bunch movie, where she played Alice the Maid, and from her work as the co–producer of the documentary on Ralph Nader, “An Unreasonable Man”.

The comedy show only raised about $7000––but they told me that that was a sensational amount for any congressional race in Vermont.

I am still a strong supporter of Pres. Barack Obama, although I am disappointed in his continuation of several of the Bush policies including not closing Guantánamo, sending more troops to Afghanistan to lengthen that senseless war, and continuing the Bush tax cuts. Bernie Sanders has been on the right side of these issues since the very beginning.

And so, for his unwavering dedication to do the right thing and take a stand––even for eight and a half hours in his recent filibuster––I award Bernie Sanders the Mensch of The Year 2010.

By the way, he gave me the Bernie campaign button, which we have to this day.

538 Ways To Live, Work, And Play Like A Liberal

2010-10-25T17:43:00.005-04:00

As a standup comedian and political activist, I traveled the tea party circuit in New Jersey, and around the country to collect the grist for my comedy mill. I am often with conservative, libertarian Republicans, tea party people and right-wing extremist looney tunes people that would make Christine O'Donnell look normal.

So it is a pleasure when I get to hang out with creative, critical thinking liberal progressive Democrats.

I had the opportunity of meeting Justin Krebs for the first time about two years ago at his theater The Tank in New York City. I had heard a lot about Justin over the years as the producer of “Laughing Liberally”, a comedy production that traveled the country featuring some of the most outstanding left of center political comedians in the nation.

However, the first time I got a chance to really sit down and talk to Justin, was at the Netroots Nation Conference last year in Pittsburgh and this year in Nevada. I was very pleased to hear but he put down his thoughts about being a liberal in the book: “538 Ways To Live, Work, And Play Like A Liberal”.

Right now he is traveling the country joining Drinking Liberally groups around the nation promoting his book. As Justin says, “if we're going to succeed as a country, and as a society, we need to understand we're all in this together. Being liberal is the belief that were better off when we live for each other then when we live only for ourselves and it is the only philosophy that can change the world for the better.” An excellent thought from a critical thinking liberal.

Some of the tips in Justin's book include:

Watch MSNBC instead of Fox news

Where the flag with pride

Make progressive financial investments

Support liberal businesses

Embrace a political conversation with a relative rather than avoid it

Bring independent films to a local movie theater

Start a Drinking Liberally chapter and try some of the group's signature drinks

Well, that's only seven of the total 538. You've got 531 more to go in this great book of tips. Maybe you can get the book for a conservative libertarian friend for Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, winter solstice, or a birthday.

The book is available on Amazon.com here.

No News Corp Is Good News Corp

2010-10-24T21:44:00.003-04:00

10.25.10: No News Corp Is Good News Corp

As many people in New Jersey know, the Fox channel has been off the air in many homes because its parent company News Corp. and Cablevision have not been able to agree on payment issues. That has voters turning to elected officials and candidates to see what they are doing to make Fox available.

Scott Sipprelle originally misheard what the problem is and thought that it was "lox" that was unavailable. He immediately held a press conference in East Brunswick condemning Rush Holt and his liberal policies for impeding small businesses from providing a sufficient supply of smoked salmon.

Gov. Chris Christie went right to the microphones blaming President Obama and Washington bureaucrats for impeding the airing of Fox. When Christie was then told that it’s a dispute between two private companies, he quickly hired Bret Schundler as a telecommunications czar and then immediately fired him.

Aides to Senate President Steve Sweeney indicated that it wasn’t a top priority for him, considering that Sweeney’s television programs are preselected by Chris Christie. “One of Christie’s people comes over to my house on the weekends and sets up my DVR for the whole week,” Sweeney said. “It’s so nice not having to make decisions about what to watch.”

Senator Michael Doherty quickly became the public face of the TEA Party movement, otherwise known as the Television Enough Already group. “None of the Founding Fathers ever watched television,” Doherty said while encouraging people to instead read the Federalist Papers at night by candlelight.

Lt. Governor Kim Guadagno came out with the following statement: “Hi, I’m Kim Guadagno and I’m the Lieutenant Governor of New Jersey.”

Assembly Speaker Sheila Oliver was originally on Cablevision’s side, but then she found out that Joe DiVincenzo likes watching reruns of “The Office” in the evening so she switched her position to backing Fox.

Anna Little indicated that Fox would have been able to pay the higher fees that Cablevision wants if “Fox didn’t have to pay for the exorbitant medical bills for its employees that Obamacare mandates thanks to Frank Pallone.”

Here’s hoping we can get this problem resolved quickly before the NJEA starts to get blamed.

9.16.10 New reality show this Fall “Snooki and The Mayor”

2010-09-16T08:14:00.000-04:00

New reality show this Fall “Snooki and The Mayor”

Follow the hilarious romp when an Italian girl from the other side of the tunnel in Marlboro, New York develops a twitter relationship with the African-American Mayor of Newark!

It’s the first TwitCom of the new Twitter season! Here is just a Twitter sample of the wacky crazy laughs you’ll get each week:

"Ugh stuck in newark traffic is no fun...Omg why I got a stick shift I will never know. Stop and go traffic I'm killen myself here
:( " -- Snooki tweets

"Snooki! I'm the mayor where R U so I can give u a ticket 4 texting & driving we needs revenue!" -- tweet from Newark mayor Cory Booker

Is that wacky or what!

Gov. Ted Strickland of Ohio proclaims “Bret Schundler Day”

2010-09-02T23:53:00.003-04:00

“Today is a day that is stupendous, for all of Ohio–––and all its descendants,” announced Gov. Ted Strickland in proclaiming today, September 3, officially “Bret Schundler Day” in the Buckeye State.

The former education commissioner of the state of New Jersey may be reviled in the Garden State, but in Ohio he is a hero to the several hundred thousand children of the Ohio school system.

Last week, because of the actions of Schundler, Ohio will receive $400 million from the Obama administration to improve schools. “Screw Justin Bieber,” said 11-year-old Jessica Lynn Grant of Columbus, Ohio. “Mr. Schundler is my new hero––because of him we don't have to lose cheerleading, or after school lacrosse. He's cool.”

The U.S. Department of Education announced that Ohio was among nine states and the District of Columbia that will receive funding in the second round of the $4.35 billion “Race to the Top” competition. Other winners include Florida, Georgia, Hawaii, Maryland, Massachusetts, New York, North Carolina and Rhode Island.

A principal from a middle school in Dayton, Ohio––who wished to remain anonymous––had a similar opinion: “… the schools here usually suck. But Mr. Schundler's actions will allow our schools to suck just a little bit less this year. And I don't have to give up my raise or vacation.”

The governor continued reading from the proclamation he had just signed:

“Whereas Bret Schundler has long been known as having a commitment to the education of the children of Ohio and;

Whereas it was his actions alone that enabled Ohio to finish 10th in the
“Race to the Top” federal funding for education competition and;

Whereas his actions enabled the Buckeye State to receive $400 million to help hire teachers, provide scholarships for students, and keep our schools open;

Therefore, it is in great recognition of the fine contribution Bret Schundler has made to the state of Ohio for all of our students and teachers; I proclaim today September 3, 2010 “Bret Schundler Day”.

“Schundler really helped bring bucks to the Buckeye state," finished the governor with a little smirk.Gov. Christie's office in New Jersey could not be reached for comment.

The Cost of Incompetence

2010-08-30T21:53:00.003-04:00

Candidate Chris Christie made a point over and over again about his fight against corruption in New Jersey government as US attorney. And Gov. Chris Christie made it a point to vilify, bully, and denigrate the teachers of the NJEA.

He even made a joke about it when questioned by Star-Ledger reporter Tom Moran. Doesn't seem quite as funny now, does the governor Christie?

Gov. Chris Christie asked the teachers in New Jersey to give up their pay raises.
Gov. Chris Christie asked New Jersey voters last April to vote against their local school budgets.
Gov. Chris Christie took a hard stand against the NJEA and all that organization did for the past who knows how many years to make New Jersey schools the best schools in the country.

And what did Chris Christie give back for all he asked? Incompetence.

$400 million. For that same amount of money, the following could have been provided:

5200 Elementary School Teachers for One Year.

Or 44,600 Head Start Slots for Children for One Year.

Or the 33,706 University Scholarships for High School Students for One Year.

So Gov. Christie, when Tom Moran asks you about your administration's incompetence and what that means for the citizens of New Jersey, are you going to laugh about that, too?

US Department of Education reveals real reason why New Jersey lost “Race to the Top” funding: Gov. Christie was on “steroids”.

2010-08-26T08:08:00.001-04:00

It seems that baseball is not the only American pastime plagued with steroids these days: US Department of Education spokesperson Grant Handley revealed today the real reason why New Jersey lost out on $700 million in educational funding: “it's obvious from the mistakes in this application, and the way it was hurried down to DC from New Jersey that it was obviously prepared by someone on steroids. And that someone is Gov. Chris Christie.

Under US Department of Education funding federal statutes, it is “illegal to use any substance such as steroids, narcotics, or perception enhancing drugs when preparing an application for any type of federal funding.” Ironically, this law was signed by Pres. George W. Bush––the man who appointed Chris Christie to be US attorney.

Mr. Handley made note that this was not the first time that it was observed that Chris Christie may have been on performance enhancing steroids. Like Roger Clemens when he threw a bat at Met catcher Mike Piazza in the 2000 World Series, steroids can cause “rage, irritation, extreme arrogance and lashing out at others on a regular basis. With the New Jersey governor's attitude towards the NJEA, small towns and suburbs and most recently Justice Wallace of the Supreme Court––it's obvious that the governor has been suffering from steroid rage for a long time.”

Other evidence of governors use is his enormous “bulking up”––similar to the way baseball homerun hitters Barry Bonds and Mark McGwire looked after many years of being on steroids. “You don't look you don't look that ‘bulked up’ from just eating food,” said a source inside the governor's office, who wished to remain anonymous.

Other evidence of the governor's use of steroids in the past was his blaming on Commissioner of Education Bret Schundler for a “compromise” he made with the NJEA back in June during the first round of “Race to the Top” educational funding. Back then, he hid his steroid use by saying of Schundler, "I’m sure we’ll have disagreements in the future. Hopefully we’ll just handle them a little differently,”--after which he flew into a steroid rage.

Handley pointed out that last fall Christie flew into a steroid rage in front of Congress, when he was giving testimony. He left in a hurry, saying that he had to “catch a train and get back to New Jersey.”

Congressman Lance: “yada yada yada… tax cuts… yada yada yada… Republican ‘no’ votes"

2010-08-24T08:22:00.000-04:00

Last night I went to the town hall meeting of my congressman, Leonard Lance. Unlike, the summer town hall meetings of 2009, this was rather tame by comparison.

First of all, I want to say that I like Leonard Lance very much. When I was on Borough Council in Flemington, he was always extraordinarily helpful getting us much-needed financial support from the state for roads and other municipal projects. Back then, State Sen. Lance would have no problem getting “earmarks” for those in his district. But now, Congressman Lance toes the Republican line against such earmarks. Oh, what a difference a few years and a larger district makes.

I expected that there would be many Tea Party people taking the Congressman to task on his Cap and Trade vote––but I guess that issue is mostly over since the June primary. Back then, three separate Tea Party candidates failed to garner even a majority of the vote to oust Lance. So there were conservative Tea Party people there at the Town Hall meeting, who had only supportive questions for the congressman. The only time I heard them peep or squawk was when a Democrat got up to ask a question and expressed support for Obama,––then there were boos and hisses. They were rude bunch to say the least.

There's no question about it---after seeing him last night---Congressman Lance is very different from State Sen. Lance. State Sen. Lance is the person who bucked his own party by voting against a pension bond scheme by then Gov. and family friend Christie Todd Whitman. He also was the person as Sen. Lance to sue then Governor Jim McGreevy over borrowing money for the state without voter approval.

I got a chance to ask him if he had to do it over again, would he support Cap and Trade this time around. His answer: "No, I would not.” His answer, however, did not surprise me––because he flip-flopped on this issue mostly under pressure from the right wing of his party. What did surprise me is his reason for flip-flopping on the issue: He said that the reason why he would not vote for Cap and Trade again is because “the Obama administration did a poor job of negotiating in Copenhagen”, and he wasn't willing to take on the responsibility for the United States to deal with this issue alone. Of course, the follow-up question I should've asked had I thought of it would have been, “so Congressman, had the Obama administration negotiated successfully in Copenhagen then you would still be supporting Cap and Trade?”

And so, Congressman Lance “yada yada yada’d” his way through questions about his “no” votes on job creation, consumer protection against Wall Street's schemes, and his switch on Cap and Trade. I believe that he is still one of the few Republicans who was moderate in his heart, but has become conservative in his “political brain”.

As long as the seventh District has to have a Republican in Congress, I wish we had the old Leonard Lance back. He was a maverick, he was independent, and voted his own mind. Unfortunately, we may not see that Leonard Lance again for a while––if at all.

Anna Little is now following me on Twitter! And boy, am I excited!

2010-08-01T10:27:00.004-04:00

This morning, I awoke to the following e-mail:

“Anna Little is now following your tweets on Twitter. A little information about Anna Little: 2380 following. 2306 followers.”

Now, while that doesn't seem to me like a really great number of Twitter “followers” for someone running for Congress. However, I really shouldn't talk. I have a mere 277 followers, and I follow 522 people. I don't know what it says about you if you are following twice as many people as are following you––I do feel kind of like a very unpopular high school geek. But, I digress.

Waaaaaay back at the beginning of the summer in June, on New Jersey Primary Day, Anna Little was outspent, out–gunned and out-media-ed by her billionaire primary opponent, Diane Gooch for the right to run against Frank Pallone for Congress in NJ-6. Gooch spent $200,574 on her campaign, more than ten times as much as Little spent, after raising $432,902. Little won the nomination on a literal shoestring budget of $19,503. So it goes.

Little, under her Twitter feed, lists the following bio:

“I am a Constitutional Conservative running for Congress to beat Frank Pallone in #NJ6 and resist the progressive agenda. It's time to take our Country back!”

Notice that she capitalizes the words ‘constitutional’ and ‘conservative’, and “country”–––like she owns them. Like they are hers. Like she has had them trademarked and no one else can use them. I'm surprised she doesn't have a little “TM” in a circle next to each word.

However, she fails to capitalize The Words “progressive” or “agenda”. Oh, she does properly capitalize the words “Frank” and “Pallone”.

Before the primary way back in June, I asked AFP president Steve Lonegan for a prediction––and he correctly predicted that Little would beat Gooch. So, I offered him the following bet––which he took: if Little wins, then I write a check to AFP for $100. However, if Frank Pallone wins, then Steve writes a check for $100 to the ACLU-NJ.

And so, now I will begin to follow Anna Little on Twitter because they tell me that it's only courteous that if someone follows you, you should follow them right back.

My prediction: the ACLU of New Jersey will be $100 richer in November.

What Their Side Says----

2010-07-02T05:57:00.004-04:00

Now you may have thought that the only people from Their Side who say wacky things are Michael Patrick Carroll, Steve Lonegan and Michael Doherty, but nooooo. Here are others---What Their Side Says...

A congressional candidate in Alabama, Rick Barber, a self-described tea party adherent, claims in a new advertisement that the health law amounts to "slavery," reports, in a separate story. "In his latest ad, the tea party candidate is speaking with a revived Abraham Lincoln.

'Hey Abe,' Barber says, 'if someone is forced to work for months to pay taxes so that a total stranger can get a free meal, a medical procedure or a bailout, what's that called?' Before Lincoln answers, Barber cuts in to ask: 'What's it called when one man is forced to work for another?' 'Slavery,' Lincoln says.”

"Barber will face Martha Roby in a runoff on July 13 for the GOP nomination to oppose incumbent Alabama Rep. Bobby Bright (D) in November." Barber defended his ad, which also included Nazi imagery, saying "Somebody has to say this. When Hitler took power, no one wanted to think that the Holocaust, the murder of 6 million Jewish people, was possible. I'm saying that you have to recognize and name tyranny when you see it", according to MSNBC.

Great way to clean out your basement

2010-07-01T00:09:00.007-04:00

Great way to clean out your basement

I had the opportunity of interviewing David Larsen, the guy who scored the most points against Leonard Lance in the seventh Congressional District in the primary. Larsen told me that he showed up one day at Lance's district office in Flemington with 50 or so “flip-flops” nailed to a board––to represent Lance’s “flip-flop” votes in Congress. Larson videotaped that for his website––and I must say Lance's staff was very patient.

A few weeks later Democratic Congressional candidate Ed Potosnak came to Lance's office with a box full of munchkins to represent Lance's vote on closing the doughnut hole a Medicare payments––I think.

So this gave me an idea: what a great way to clean out crap from your basement! All you need is an incumbent candidate running for office, some crap from your basement you’re trying to get rid of, and a good bull should reason for dropping off that stuff that the office. And–voilà! –You’re in business.

Let's say, for example, you have one of those Stairmaster™ exercise machines in your house that's become just a place to hang dirty laundry. You can drop it off at, let's say, Congressman Scott Garrett's office––and proudly declare, “Garrett has to step up and start working for the people––not just for himself!”

That might work.

Or your aunt Edna sent you a fruitcake for Christmas but you're still trying to get rid of. All you need to do is drop it off at Sen. Gerald Cardinale’s office in Cresskill, while passionately stating, “the senator’s votes on marriage equality make him as nutty as a fruitcake.”

Suppose you have an old ugly green paisley un-upholstered chair that you purchased at a yard sale and it has been in your basement for about seven years, (we had such a chair)––maybe you could leave it off at Sen. Michael Doherty’s office fiercely stating, “Since winning a seat in the Senate, Doherty’s votes are all worn out. And green and paisley.”

Well maybe some of them don't work perfectly, but you get the idea. I'm sure they’re are others.

At the Right Conference this time.

2010-06-07T18:16:00.001-04:00

The last two political conferences I went to were the Americans for Prosperity national conference in Pittsburgh--and then the Americans for Prosperity conference in New Jersey last March. As a fat, old, bearded guy--I think I fit in very well with the right wing folks--and that enables me to walk amongst them, eat with them, and ask them questions about their politics. In a way, I feel inspired by Dian Fossey and her experience with the gorillas of Rwanda. She ate with them, walked amongst them, and watch them mate ---for more than a year to get a sense of what they were like. You probably saw the movie Gorillas in the Mist. Well, I tried to do everything she did--except watch the right wing mate. But now, I feel more at home.

I drove down from New Jersey this morning to Washington DC to attend the Take Back America conference, which is a gathering of 800 or so progressives--and there is quite a difference from when this group gathered in 2008. Back then, we had a president who strongly favored offshore oil drilling, we were entrenched in a quagmire both in Iraq and Afghanistan, and Americans were very upset about the bailing of the financial industry.. But today, things are different: we have a president who favors offshore oil drilling, we are entrenched in a quagmire both in Iraq and Afghanistan and more Americans are more upset about bailing out of the financial industry. So, for progressives the more things change the more they remain the same.

At this conference, the "Take Back America" was subtitled "The America's Future Now! Conference."

Now, with a president who was selected on a progressive platform, the issue for most of the people here was: How do you hold the Democrats and Pres. Obama accountable for the platform that helped him get elected? Especially in an environment with a bad economy and Tea Party people ready to vote all incumbents out of office?

That seems to be the big question that everyone here will be trying to answer over the next 2 1/2 days.

TV Time

2010-05-26T00:32:00.003-04:00

Before I knew that I suffered from severe ADD, I watch lots of television usually 6-7 hours a day was the norm for me. My earliest conscious memory was at the age of three, asking my mother when she was completely asleep at 530 in the morning if I could watch television in the living room. These really old black-and-white cartoons went on at 6 AM -- and if I got there early enough I could catch the last 15 minutes of a show called "The Modern Farmer". This show was on between 5 AM and 6 AM and it taught farmers had to use modern methods to increase their crop production, take care of their livestock, etc. It never occurred to me at the time as to why such a show was running on a station in Brooklyn, New York.

Anyway, I got into the regular habit of watching too much television way too early. Two hours in the morning before breakfast. Two hours right after school. An hour are or so during dinner and three hours (at least) at night. My parents used to punish me by forcing me to cut back my television watching to just four hours per day -- -- a horrible fate for me.

Anything you see on Nick at night or TV land from the 1960s was what I watched with devotion and religious fervor. The benefit for me later in life: I became an outstanding player in the TV version of Trivial Pursuit. But that is another story.

Needless to say, between ADD and TV I did not read much.

So in the seventh grade at JHS 278, Mrs. Lichtenstein assigned us books to read over the Christmas holiday season. Two weeks to read a book and do an oral report on the first day after vacation. Mentally, to me that was like climbing Mount Everest. Mrs. Lichtenstein was of German background -- -- she never smiled, gave too much homework and had a stare that could melt lead. To my friend Chris, she gave "To Kill a Mockingbird". To Deborah, she gave some book about a dancer who died. To me, she gave “Fail-Safe". The thinnest book on the shelf. It was about 200 pages long and I had two weeks to read it. Work out the math yourself ---when Mrs. Lichtenstein handed me the book, she said sternly, "10 minute oral book report on January 3, Mr. Novick," I hate being called Mr. Novick -- -- even more than being called Joseph.

So, “Fail-Safe" stayed on my dresser for the first week of the vacation totally untouched. And then one morning I picked it up. An offshoot of severe ADD was severe procrastination. I thumbed through it, read about a paragraph from one page -- -- "... the president was silent after the news...". And I promptly put it down again.

For the next seven days the vision of dread grew larger and larger in my 12-year-old head. At Day Seven, it appeared in the distance like a small dark cloud on the horizon. Each day it grew longer and larger and greater in focus. By Day Three, it became a large dark gray menacing face blotting out everything in the sky. The night before it was the only thing in the sky I could see.

The night before the first day of school after vacation, I was watching TV, of course. And as I thumbed through the TV Guide, -- -- there it was on Channel 9. WOR -- TV. The Late Late Show at 3:15 AM: “Fail-Safe" the movie. In glorious black and white. "...a 1964 film directed by Sidney Lumet, based on the 1962 novel of the same name by Eugene Burdick and Harvey Wheeler…”. Hey, Burdick and Wheeler? These were the same guys whose name was on the book that I had up in my room. I could do this. I could watch it take notes and give a 10 minute oral book report. There was a God.

So, promptly at 3:10 AM, I woke myself up, snuck into the living room and turn on the TV. My parents’ bedroom door was closed. And I covered my head and the TV screen with a big towel to keep excess light and sound from creeping out of the living room. I set as close as I could to the screen to keep the sound down as low as possible. As close as I was to the screen, the light from the TV could've been very good for my eyes.

There were too many late-night commercials I thought. I tried my best to stay awake and get enough of the gist of the movie. I took notes and sloppy handwriting that I hoped I could recognize the next day.

January 3: we were to do our book reports just after lunch. My heart was pounding solidly in my chest. I felt like Mrs. Lichtenstein stare was burning a hole in my head the entire morning. Chris went first and stumbled through "To Kill a Mockingbird" -- -- he was thorough but nervous. Maybe his nervousness would take the edge off of Mrs. Lichtenstein when I spoke. And then, Mrs. Lichtenstein said, “ Mr. Novick – Fail Safe please.”

I slowly walked to the front of the room, with my notes in my hand I turned and looked at Mrs. Lichtenstein -- -- I made my first mistake -- I felt cocky so I "smirked". Perhaps that smirk did me in.

“Fail Safe is the story of how the United States accidentally dropped an atomic bomb on Moscow, and the president was unable to stop it and order the plane back....". My second mistake at this point was looking over to Mrs. Lichtenstein. That second look lead her to read my body language to tell her that something was wrong.

As I began to continue to read my notes, Mrs. Lichtenstein asked me The Question: "Mr. Novick, in Fail Safe who played the president?". And then my mouth acted completely on its own: "Henry Fonda,". I tried to continue, but she just stopped me. How was I to know that Mrs. Lichtenstein read TV Guide also?

Well anyway, Mrs. Lichtenstein sent a note home with me to get my parents. They force me to read Fail-Safe from cover to cover and get a written report. And you're what I discovered? The book was actually better than the movie -- -- no commercials. And I did get punished -- -- just four hours a night of TV for the next week.

The Week's Best Late-Night Jokes

2010-05-17T06:51:00.005-04:00

The Week's Best Late-Night Jokes

Political comedy is tough. You are always going to offend someone, but these folks don’t seem to mind. And the shelf life a political comedy joke can sometimes be less than 24 hours. But these guys endeavor to do their best work as soon as CNN, the New York Times, or Glenn Beck reports the news.

America is blessed by having several late-night common show hosts who also offer outstanding political comedy. Jay Leno, Bill Mahr, Jon Stewart, and and even Jimmy Fallon sometimes gets into the act, channeling his former role as the cohost of news update on SNL. But the best political comedian out there today on TV has got to be Lewis Black. So you can decide for yourself, here are the top 10 political humor lines from last week.

10 --"There's speculation that the 1,000-point drop in the Dow may have been sparked by a typo, where someone entered 'billion' instead of 'million' on a trading order. Economists are saying a single letter hasn't caused this many problems since the letter 'Dubya.'" —Jimmy Fallon

9- "At a stop in Buffalo today, a woman walks up to President Obama and says, 'You're a hottie with a smokin' little body .' She said that to the president of the United States. I tell you, Betty White is out of control." —Jay Leno

8-"This oil spill in the Gulf is affecting everybody. In fact, when I went to lunch this weekend and ordered the sea bass, they asked if I wanted it regular or unleaded." —David Letterman

7-"British Petroleum said today that if this spill gets worse, they may soon have to start drilling for water." —Jay Leno

6-"Dick Cheney's pals at Halliburton ... say they're going to do the underwater cement job to plug the hole. I thought, wait a minute, this is a mistake. Underwater cement? You call the mafia. Am I right?" —David Letterman

5-"The oil company said it was the rig company's fault. The rig company said it was Halliburton. And somehow, each time they passed the blame, Goldman Sachs made a hundred million dollars." —Bill Maher

4-"We're still dropping things on it. This is like if your toilet overflowed and you tried to fix it by smashing it with a brick. Their next idea is to get the old lady from Titanic and she's going to throw her jewelry at it." —Bill Maher, on the oil spill in the Gulf

3-"Well, in Colorado one of the gubernatorial candidates has taken out a Craigslist ad to find a running mate. Is that a good idea? Hey, it didn't work when John McCain tried it." —Jay Leno

2-"Good news from the world of publishing. Sarah Palin , former governor of Alaska, has a new book coming out this fall. The warning came from an alert T-shirt vendor." —David Letterman

1-On Glenn Beck's complaints that critics of Arizona's immigration are making Nazi comparisons: "Glenn Beck is offended! Glenn Beck thinks playing the Nazi card is going too far. Glenn Beck — this is a guy who uses more Swastika props and video of the Nuremberg rallies than the History Channel." —Lewis Black, in a brilliant Daily Show rant in which he demonstrated that Glenn Beck has "Nazi Tourette's “

"It's 'Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon, except there's just one degree, and Kevin Bacon is Hitler. Can I play? Let's see. Mother Teresa had a mustache. Hitler had a mustache. Mother Teresa is Hitler!" —Lewis Black, on Glenn Beck's frequent use of Nazi analogies.

Take My Mother in Law, Please

2010-05-13T22:25:00.004-04:00

Apparently in the state of New Jersey it is perfectly okay to poke fun at your mother in law, but not your former law firm. In two separate cases, we find out some very interesting information about the First Amendment as applied in New Jersey.

A federal judge threw out a defamation suit against comedian Sunda Croonquist, ruling effectively that her Jewish mother-in-law jokes are “opinions and thus protected by the First Amendment.” The judge described her jokes, although tinged with “racism”, as merely "colorful, figurative rhetoric". It makes one wonder if Judge Mary Cooper would have felt the same way if the jokes were about lawyers -- -- -- and judges.

Croonquist’s background serves as the basis for her comedy -- -- she is the product of a black mother and a Swedish father -- -- she was given a Hindu name and attended a white Catholic school in Patterson. Well, we can see that there are yuks aplenty there.

And, of course, to complete her comedy career she had to, of course, marry into a Jewish family -- -- so she can have a Jewish mother-in-law to make fun of. But her mother-in-law, Ruth Zafrin, was none too happy with being the center of Croonquist’s barbs. The lawsuit was filed in Superior Court in 2009 alleging defamation, false light and intentional and negligent infliction of emotional distress -- -- not to mention unjust enrichment. I have not seen Croonquist’s name listed into many comedy clubs in New Jersey, so I'm not quite sure exactly how much she's being "enriched" by her Jewish jokes about her mother-in-law.

Ironically, Ruth’s filing of this lawsuit most likely drew more attention to what she was trying to stop -- -- and made Croonquist more popular in the process. Good going Ruth!

In another case, a federal judge in Trenton refused to dismiss a suit by Levinson Axelrod against a former associate who set up a website to trash the firm. The site put up by former employee Edward Heyburn -- "Levinson Axelrod Really Sucks" -- -- compelled Levinson Axelrod to believe that the use of the name in the title of the website would cause confusion about whether or not it was connected with the firm. Yes, I'm sure that's the case, when people read a website that says ‘this law firm really sucks’, they're going to think it's just a way of generating a business for their lawyers. Really.

Heyburn, on the website, bashes his former law firm, celebrates the firm's losses in court," has fun with the firm's own promotional videos by overdubbing. Sounds like he's protected by the First Amendment to me.

Anyway, perhaps Heyburn and Croonquist should get together and exchange notes.

Two Guys Talkin' Sports

2010-04-22T07:25:00.001-04:00

Carl Mayer and Bruce Afran: Some people may think that these two lawyers have way too much time on their hands. Others might think that maybe their getting their signals crossed. But maybe if you're a Jets fan, you'd like to see these two guys on the front line next fall.

These two NJ lawyers---one of them a Jets season ticket holder---filed a lawsuit arising from the New England Patriots' secret videotaping of New York Jets coaches in a game at Giants Stadium in 2007. The U.S. Third Circuit Court of Appeals in Philadelphia heard oral arguments Wednesday.

I would certainly imagine that President Obama will be watching the results of this case and the Solomon-like judicial prudence of the Third Circuit Court of Appeals as they ponder what to do for lawyers and Jets fans Mayer and Afran.

The Patriots were caught taping signals by Jets coaches, a violation of league rules, during the opening game of the 2007 season. New England won 38-14 at Giants Stadium in East Rutherford.

Mayer and Afran assert that the Patriots' actions "violated the contractual expectations and rights of New York Jets ticket-holders" who paid to watch a game played in compliance with the league's rules; that teams that participate can't commit fraud on ticket holders; and that "the Patriots violated federal racketeering laws as well as New Jersey's consumer protection laws by concealing material facts-the existence of the videotaping-from paying customers."

I am certainly sure that this will make for better relations between the Garden State and Massachusetts, also.

The lawsuit asserts that fans should be compensated for all games played in Giants Stadium between the Jets and Patriots since Belichick became head coach in 2000---and that fans are entitled to triple that amount-or $184.8 million in compensation. Earlier U.S. District Judge Garrett Brown Jr. in Trenton dismissed the case when he ruled that a ticket seller only contracts to provide entry to a ticket holder "to view whatever event transpires."

Mayer and Afran have been to court many times before ---unsuccessfully---to try to get McGreevy to leave office, and to try to get then Governor-elect Corzine, upon assumption of office, from appointing someone to fill the balance of his Senate term.

At one time Mayer ran in a primary against Rush Holt for Congress---and lost. And, no, Mayer did not sue Congressman Holt when he failed to win the primary.

March 26, 2010 Putz of the Week and Mensch of the Week

2010-03-26T00:57:00.001-04:00

Last summer, "Jersey Shore” introduced America to Snookie, Mike the Situation and J-WOWW. These folks helped make Jersey Shore the top Thursday night prime-time show for viewers ages 12 to 34. And now they're going global.

Viacom is planning to take the show to more than 30 countries around the world -- -- including Portugal, France and Italy. This is exactly what New Jersey needs to enhance its reputation from Europe to the Pacific Rim. Gee, thanks Viacom.

It's almost certain that the only folks who will benefit from this expansion will be the cast themselves -- -- reportedly now making more than $10,000 per episode. Maybe Jersey Shore will be more popular in France than Jerry Lewis. For all their efforts, in helping the world see New Jersey through the eyes of the folks on Jersey Shore, Viacom is our Putz of the Week.

I have lived in Hunterdon County for more than 20 years. I served on the Borough Council in the county seat of Flemington from 1994 to 2006. And I served as the county chairman of the Democratic Party for two terms. I attended many freeholder meetings, wrote newspaper editorials criticizing the County government, and ran campaigns for many County candidates. But now, I need to give our county government kudos for a really great accomplishment.

New Jersey Foundation for Open Government is an organization dedicated to an open and transparent government. In the interest of complete disclosure, I sat on their state board for two years.

During 2009, NJFOG and Common Cause worked together to develop a checklist of government information that should be readily available on the web. And they awarded Hunterdon County with a certificate that placed the county at the top of a survey on how much open-government information counties provide on their web sites.

So, for their commitment to open government, transparency, and a very accessible website for the residents of our County, this week our Mensch of the Week is the Hunterdon County government.

Stop screaming. You’ll wake up the neighbors

2010-03-18T07:04:00.001-04:00

If you're a local town mayor in New Jersey and you think that screaming about the impact Christie’s budget cuts will have on your town is an issue, it seems that “…screaming too loud during sex can get you or your partner arrested in New Jersey."

Yes, really.

It seems that in an appeals court ruling that was handed down on Monday, the judges said the “screaming reported by a neighbor gave police an ‘objectively reasonable basis’ to believe that a limited investigation was necessary”---to see if everything was OK in the home. I should it say it was OK. Well, at least for the partner screaming, I guess.

The police entered the home to see what the fuss and screaming was about, and saw marijuana and drug paraphernalia in plain view----leading to the arrest of the folks. Oh, well. Maybe they should have claimed it was ‘medical marijuana’ and he was giving her a special treatment. Maybe next time.

March 17th, 2010 The Day New Jersey Stood Still

2010-03-17T07:33:00.001-04:00

March 17th, 2010 The Day New Jersey Stood Still

It was like the plot from the 1950s science fiction movie: An alien (first Republican elected state-wide in very Blue New Jersey in 12 years) with his mighty robot (Big Budget Ax) land their spacecraft in State Capital Trenton. We need to say, "Klaatu barada nikto!" before it's too late.

They bring an important message to the State that he wishes to tell to representatives of the entire State. However, communication turns out to be difficult, so, after learning something about the natives, he decides on an alternative approach. He lives amongst us, and he reveals himself, along with the news that Big Budget Ax is a member of a race of super-robot enforcers invented to keep the budget of the State in check--- that will destroy the State if provoked.

Some of the major proposals in Republican Un-Governor Chris Christie's 2011 budget:

Education:

— Reduces state aid to primary and secondary K-12 schools by $820 million. Schools will lose up to 5 percent of their budgets. Districts where state aid is less than 5 percent will lose all that aid.

— Reduces state aid to colleges and universities by $175 million; eliminates aid to independent universities.

Property Taxes:

— Eliminates rebates for everyone in 2010.

— Gives reduced rebates to senior citizens, the disabled and low-income wage earners in April of 2011.

— Allows no one additional to join the "senior freeze" program, which lets low-income senior and disabled citizens lock in their property tax rates when they enroll.

— Proposes that rebate checks be converted to automatic property tax credits.

— Proposes that a 2.5 percent cap on property taxes be enacted for towns and schools. If towns or schools want to exceed the cap, they must get voter approval.

Income Taxes:

— Reduces the state tax credit for lower-income workers known as the Earned Income Tax Credit to 20 percent from 25 percent of the federal benefits. The eligibility would remain the same, but the credit would be lower.

Health Care:

— As of July 1, allows no more adults can enroll in the NJ FamilyCare program. The program offers free or subsidized health insurance coverage to low-income children and their parents.

— Closes two state-run hospitals, Hagedorn Psychiatric Hospital in Glen Gardner — one of four such state-run facilities in the state — and Vineland-West Hospital.

Layoffs:

— Approximately 1,300 state workers will face layoffs beginning in January. It is unclear how many of those are union workers and when the layoffs will occur.

Pensions:

— Skips a $3 billion pension payment to a system that is already underfunded by $46 billion.

March 14, 2010 Governor Christie Cuts The Day to Just 23 Hours

2010-03-14T11:20:00.001-04:00

Governor Christie Cuts The Day to Just 23 Hours

In yet another Executive Order sure to rile clock and calendar makers, Governor Chris Christie issued Executive Order 247, cutting back an hour a day from the days in New Jersey.

“This will save New Jersey residents 365 hours every year, and at least $7.25 per hour per resident ----roughly a total of $23,067,361,250.00 for our state coffers. That’s a lot, I think,” said the spokesman for the governor.

Democratic legislative leadership vowed to request the New Jersey Supreme Court to issue a stay to the Executive Order 247, and have the “Order only effect just Sunday, March 14,” and “to get the hour back by the fall in November.” This order particularly irked the Democratic leadership because of the governor signing the order to take place "between 2AM and 3AM" Sunday morning, "while New Jersey residents slept".

EXECUTIVE ORDER NO. 247

WHEREAS, the State of New Jersey (“State”) is confronting an unprecedented temporal crisis affecting all levels of government; and

WHEREAS, actual and anticipated time spent and utilized by the State continue to fall far below the amounts estimated in the Temporal Year 2010

NOW, THEREFORE, I, CHRIS CHRISTIE, Governor of the State of New Jersey, by virtue of the authority vested in me by the Constitution and by the Statutes of this State, do hereby ORDER and DIRECT:

That ONE-HOUR per day shall be removed from the days in New Jersey, commencing Sunday, March 14th, 2009.

A Funny Democrat and a Funny Republican come together for a good cause.

2010-02-28T09:58:00.004-05:00

President Obama and Senator McCain may not have gotten along at the Health Care Reform Summit. And Governor Christie may have his sights set on the NJ budget woes that will sure to flare up with Senate President Steve Sweeney.

But, Republicans and Democrats can work together to work on helping raise funds for a good cause.

Stand Up Against Hunger is a fund raising event hosted by Elijah’s Promise to abate hunger in the community of New Brunswick. The one time comedy show will help raise funds for the soup kitchen.

The event boasts two featured comedians me, Joey Novick (Democrat) and Republican Assemblyman Jon Bramnick (‘Funniest Lawyer in New Jersey’) with special guest appearances by Scott Blakeman and Jeff Kreisler.

Scott Blakeman has appeared on Comedy Central's Tough Crowd with Colin Quinn, and co-hosted of several political humor segments on NBC's "Sunday Today". Scott was the warmup comedian for the Late Show with David Letterman and the CBS comedy series Welcome To New York.

Jeff Kreisler is the winner of the Bill Hicks Spirit Award for Thought Provoking Comedy, writer for Comedy Central's Indecision2008, IFC, and author of Harper Collins' "Get Rich Cheating" (a Boston Globe bestseller).

Since Elijah's Promise began in 1989, they have been helping low-income people in the central New Jersey community. From nutritious meals, to social services and health screening, to culinary arts job training and entrepreneurial training, to our their own catering business, Elijah's Promise has been moving people from hunger to wholeness.

Info:

Thursday March 18th
Crossroads Theatre (7 Livingston Ave. New Brunswick)

TICKETS:
Advanced at www.standup.dojiggy.com $25
at the door $35
Limited seating--reserve your tickets today!

Doors open at 6:15 for refreshments
Show begins at 7:00
General admission seating

Sarah Palin: Testing the Tea Waters

2010-02-07T12:08:00.002-05:00

Last night, when Sarah Palin took the stage at the first ever Tea Party Convention in Nashville, TN to the sounds of cheering from those who could afford the $300 price tag for the dinner, she was clearly testing the waters for the 2012 race for President. If my memory serves me correctly, the first tea party---the one up in Boston cost zilch. And the folks who attended dressed up in costume. The folks last night were dressed in their Conservative best.

Palin, becoming well known more for her “Quip Conservatism” rather than true conservative values, had President Obama right in her sights. She poked fun of his intellectual prowess, by declaring that, “To win that war [on terrorism], we need a commander in chief, not a professor of law,”

Yup, we were better off with someone like Bush as Commander-in-Cheif who told us with his cowboy imperialism to “Bring’em on!”, with regard to terrorists. Or someone like Palin who could not name a Supreme Court decision she’d disagree with or name a single newspaper or magazine she reads. Or said "Ohh, good, thank you, yes,” after a Canadian prank caller complimented her on the documentary about her life, Hustler's "Nailin Paylin.”

Yup, that’s who we need in the White House. Someone who declares that “I will live, I will die for the people of America…This party that we call the Tea Party, this movement, as I say, is the future of politics in America.”

As long as there is a $100,000 price tag for speaking.

However, I leave with this warning from radio-show host Lionel, posted on Facebook:

“Laugh at Sarah Palin at your own peril. She's a superstar among a very volatile and very angry electorate. Tea baggers mobilize; they show up; they vote. How many Obamanation acolytes have receded into the woodwork and retreated to their keyboards and keypads? And finally, if anyone else had said what Palin said about Obama, you might have very well agreed. You just can't believe she's this big.”

Trenton News Break:

2010-01-14T06:33:00.002-05:00

"Democrats offer to trade undisclosed amount of cash, Senators Turner, Girgenti, and Van Drew for Bill Baroni and 'Legislation to be named later'.

Deal falls apart when Webber and Repubs offer to throw in Cardinale to sweeten the pot."

Where were you when we tried to reach 62?

2010-01-06T07:29:00.002-05:00

62*: Some important facts about 62, and what the number means.

62 is a composite number with the divisors 2 and 31 being the eighteenth discreet semiprime, product of two prime numbers. The Great Rhombicosidodecahedron is an Archimedean Solid with 62 Faces. 62! = 3.14699733 × 1085.

62 is the code for international direct dial calls to Indonesia, the address of the home of Wallace and Gromit is located on West Wallaby Street, the number of counties in New York state and the number of moons orbiting Jupiter. And Pliny the Younger was born in 62 A.D.

At age 62, Ed Sullivan, introduced the Beatles to America, Franklin Roosevelt won a fourth term as President, and John Wayne won an Oscar for Best Actor for True Grit .

In 1962, The Beatles first record, "My Bonnie" with Tony Sheridan, is released by Polydor and Ringo Starr replaces Pete Best as their drummer.

In 1962, the first black student, James Meredith registers at the University of Mississippi, Johnny Carson takes over as permanent host of NBC's Tonight Show, and President John F. Kennedy makes a commitment that America will send a man to the moon by the end of the decade. And 2062 is the year when the cartoon show The Jetsons takes place.

All very important references to the number 62.

However, for the next week, 62 is the important number in New Jersey for another reason: It's the only Marriage Equality will pass.

21 members of the Senate. 41 members of the Assembly equal 62. That's the magic number.

So, the question remains: Where were you, when we tried to reach 62?

Antonia Ricigliano cuts her own salary in first act as Edison mayor

2010-01-03T10:51:00.002-05:00

Antonia "Toni" Ricigliano officially began her tenure as Edison's first female mayor yesterday with a vow. “As the first woman chief executive, there are opportunities and challenges ahead, but I am up to the task,” the Democrat told the crowd after being sworn in by her son, Joseph Ricigliano Jr., an Edison-based attorney.

“Woman in the United States traditionally get paid less, so I am going to take less money in my role as Mayor,” declared Mayor Antonia "Toni" Ricigliano of Edison. “It is the right thing to do in tough economic times.”

The 71-year-old former town councilwoman announced she's cutting the mayor's salary by $26,000.

She cited a study done by the Institute for Women’s Policy Research done on “The Gender Wage Gap: 2008”. “The ratio of women’s and men’s median annual earnings in 2008 was 77.1 for full-time, year-round workers, down from 77.8 in 2007. This means the gender wage gap is now 22.9 percent,” declared Mayor Ricigliano. “It’s the only fair thing to do.”

Also in the crowd was Ricigliano’s predecessor, Jun Choi. Ricigliano shocked the town in June when she ousted Choi -- the youngest and first Asian-American mayor in Edison history -- in the Democratic primary.

Choi said that there was nothing to the rumor that he lost because of his refusal to add a “nickname in quotes or in (parentheses)” to his official title as mayor. An unnamed Democratic consultant who asked to remain anonymous said that a “ ‘nickname in quotes or in parentheses’ makes the political figure seem more accessible to the average ‘Jersey Joe ‘or ‘Jersey Jane’ in the state. Look at the success of former Assembly Speaker Garabed ‘Chuck’ Haytaian.”

It was suggested that former Mayor Jun Choi add “Skippy” or “Education-Boy” to make the former senior official with the New Jersey Department of Education seem more user-friendly to Edison residents.

Now, Mayor Ricigliano plans to visit a place she’s never even seen before: the mayor's office. "I'll see it Monday morning," she said with a smile.

'Twas the week before 2010

2009-12-30T06:42:00.003-05:00

'Twas the week before 2010, and all through the State,

Not a Politico was worried, about our problems so great.

They were all on recess with nary a care,

West State Street was empty---not a lobbyist was there.

All Politicos went home--to the South and the North,

‘cause ‘Lame Duck’ was over, --at least ‘til the Fourth.

Both the Reds and the Blues---had new state leaders in place,

And some had their eyes on their Congressional race.

In ’09, Three Wise Men vied for the state’s top post,

Only one could win, and the others would be ‘toast’.

And for the first time, a Lt. Gov would be elected,

Serving at the side of the man who’d be selected.

But the November Election had caused such a clatter,

Talking important issues ---like which candidate was fatter.

Driving records, loans to friends, and who paid what tax.

Emails to ex-girl friends and who worked at Goldman Sachs.

While the Governor incumbent, used his own cash,

The other campaigns were paid with taxpayers’ stash.

Did they get their money’s worth in the campaign?

Well, some taxpayers voted, but they mostly abstained.

Christie went after State corruption with political zest,

Some politicos were indicted, some subject to arrest.

"On Sharpe James! On, Bryant! On Manzo, Mims Hackett!

“You’re gonna help me get to my new home, Drumthwacket.”

Christie said he’d cut spending- “I’ll turn Trenton upside down!”

“Things will change when I get to that town!”

"I will never raise your taxes! Never! Not one cent"

But never revealed specifics about what would be spent.

Back and forth the polls said the lead changed hands.

Who would we agree on? Who’d have the most fans?

Their Debate raged on like a “Who’s on First?” routine,

Only thing the candidates agreed on: Bruce Springsteen.

And so in November the result of the Election,

Was that New Jersey had chosen a new, different direction.

Of course, this was not what the Democrats would expect.

But now, Chris Christie of Mendhem is the Governor-Elect.

Some say “He is full of bluster. Will be a lousy state boss.”

“And he’d benefit much from a Dale Carnegie course.”

You can say what you will about the Christie machine.

But any governor contenders must wait till 2013.

Tis true that problems won’t change very much,

With taxes and debt and traffic and such;

Still, no better place to live than New Jersey, right here,

"Happy Holidays to all, and to all a Good Year!

Coalition of Indicted and Jailed Politcos form Group to Help State

2009-12-27T11:14:00.002-05:00

The New Jersey’s CrimeStoppers Program has made thousands of arrests and paid out hundreds of thousands of dollars in reward money over the past two decades. But officials say many of the do-gooders who have turned in thieves; rapists and killers have truly been good Samaritans and turned down the reward money.

"The majority of people don’t want the money," said Morris County CrimeStoppers Chairman John Sette. "They want the bad guys off the street."

Well, the State now has nothing to worry about: A group of former elected officials, now serving time in prison, have formed a group to help the state out, so that the money can be distributed for a “good cause”.

From behind prison doors, former State Senators Sharpe James, Wayne Bryant and John Lynch have formed CASH, Citizens Associated for State Help. “There is no group who is more committed to handing state money than we are,” said former state senator Sharpe James, through a prison spokesman. James (federal inmate number 28791-050) is currently serving a 2-year prison sentence in a federal prison camp in Petersburg, Virginia. The investigation and prosecution of James was led by New Jersey Governor-elect Christopher Christie, who at the time was the United States Attorney for the District of New Jersey.

Former State Senator John Lynch agreed, “We are used to handling large sums of cash, and are more than willing to help the state out in these tough economic times.” Lynch, the former State Senate President from 1989 to 1991, pleaded guilty in the U.S. District Court on one count of mail fraud and one count of tax evasion in 2006.

Their plan is to take the large amount of the state funds, convert it to CASH for use in the “white envelope industry, the diners on state roads, and the table manufacterors for 'under-table' construction."

"CASH is committed to helping the state in anyway we can, and we look forward to working with Governor Christie," finished Mr. James.

Former Mayors are currently forming CASH Franchises around the state. Anthony Suarez of Ridgefield, Dennis Elwell of Secaucus, Leona Beldini of Jersey City, and Peter Cammarano III of Hoboken, all forward to working with CASH.

Jersey Officials finally caught up with Ilya the Manatee. Problem: No Beach Tags.

2009-12-15T21:45:00.003-05:00

After almost two months vacationing in the Garden State, Jersey Officials finally caught up with Ilya the Manatee.

Problem: No Beach Tags.

“This big fat sea cow had no Beach Pass to speak of. And he’s been lounging around the water near the Atlas Yacht Club in Bayonne. Next, in a creek outside a Linden oil refinery,” said a local beach official who wished to remain anonymous.

Ilya was first spotted Thursday morning in Morses Creek off the Arthur Kill by a ConocoPhillips worker conducting regular inspection rounds at the Bayway refinery, according to company spokesman Rich Johnson.

Johnson was livid at this kind of scam. “If I have to reach in my pocket for a Beach Tag for my family to use the Jersey Shore, so does this fatso,” squawked Johnson, sounding perturbed. It may have been that Ilya the Manatee was not used to having to pay for a Beach Tag. The beaches along the coast from Florida through North Carolina, Virginia and Delaware are all free.

Generally, manatees weigh between 880 to 1,200 lb, and are about 9.2 feet to 9.8 feet long. Since this was a first offense, Ilya was let off with a warning. However, he was placed under the authority of the US Coast Guard, and sent back to his home state of Florida, under the aegis of the Miami Seaquarium.

“This guy Ilya was huge. It took ten of us to lift him into the transport,” said a Coast Guard spokesman. “Very lazy. All he wanted to do was float around and eat vegetables.”

The Hunterdon County Republican Committee met today to choose a Freeholder

2009-12-05T21:05:00.002-05:00

The Hunterdon County Republican Committee met today to choose a successor to replace Freeholder Erik Peterson, who resigned Tuesday to become a member of the State Assembly. Peterson took the place of Senator Michael Doherty, who stepped up to take the place of Leonard Lance, who became a member of Congress in January.

Initially, there were three candidates seeking to replace Mr. Peterson. Contenders included Mayor Rob Walton of Hampton; Tom Borkowski, a former Clinton Township mayor, and Carol Hoffmann, an Alexandria Committeewoman. But late yesterday, a fourth candidate emerged: The Wolf-Dog, who was nominated after continuing to escape from his owners in Holland Township. Wolf dogs are defined as dogs with a wolf ancestor in the past three generations.

Holland Township resident Cliff Zager thinks the Township Committee's consideration of banning wolf dogs is something personal. So, he decided to nominate his Wolf-Dog for freeholder, in an attempt to fight for his rights. Zager owns 14 of the dogs, which are a hybrid of wolves and domesticated canines. "I believe the Township is hell-bent on getting me out of here," said Zager.

“The Holland Wolf-Dog is the really perfect Republican candidate. They have unpredictable behavior patterns. Very curious and are generally more destructive than dogs. They have social habits revolving around a pack structure,” continued Zager. “Their aggression tends to peak during the winter months when hormones run high. Attacks may also be spurred by people becoming suddenly and conspicuously vulnerable due to either injury, disease or fear. Once again, the perfect Freeholder come budget time.”

However, after all the votes were counted, Hampton mayor Rob Walton was chosen by Hunterdon's Republican party leaders to be the county's fifth freeholder. “I will work hard for all Hunterdon residents,” said Walton uncomfortably, as he eyed the Wolf-Dog, growling.

Roundin' Up The News 12.2.09

2009-12-02T07:02:00.002-05:00

Here you go, folks---a round up of the top stories from around the Garden State in small bites you can almost taste.

N.J. Governor-elect blasts Democrats, Senator Paul Sarlo gives pre-emptive response.

TRENTON -- Returning from a Thanksgiving vacation, Gov.-elect Chris Christie today quickly ended any illusion of harmony in the gubernatorial transition.

With rhetorical flourish, the Republican criticized three main issues: He tore into Democratic Gov. Jon Corzine’s "wildly off" budget projections, his nomination of "unqualified" Middlesex County Sheriff Joseph Spicuzzo to sit on the New Jersey Sports and Exposition Authority, and various Democrats’ lame-duck maneuvers, including weighing bills that would require spending.

In a pre-emptive response to the Governor-elect’s criticism of the three issues, Senator Paul Sarlo declared, “Bullshit, bullshit, bullshit.”

The Governor-elect could not be reached for further comment.

Hapless NJ Nets' move to Brooklyn gets boost

The New Jersey Nets planned move to Brooklyn advanced Tuesday when the team owner received favorable ratings on the bonds he must sell to build an arena and a court knocked down another appeal of the project, according to a report in The New York Times. This was surprising considering the New Jersey Nets are lounging in last place in the Atlantic Division of the Eastern Conference at 0-17.

An anonymous source from the bond-ranking service said “We have used the same metrics here that we used to measure the economic status last year of Lehman Brothers, AIG, and General Motors. And we feel confident that the best is yet to come. The Nets will turn things around very soon.”

In other Nets related news, NJ Nets players approve of choice of Kiki Vandeweghe as new coach, who will apply immediately for TARP bailout funds from the Federal government “ so the team can afford better player, like Jason Kidd.”

New state Senator Michael Doherty targets Highlands Council.

Michael Doherty became the state senator for the 23rd District, which includes all of Warren County, on Nov. 23 in the Trenton legislative chambers. Senate President Richard Codey administered the oath, and Linda Doherty held the Bible.

Michael Doherty says he will press for the abolition of the Highlands Planning Council in his new position as state senator for the 23rd District.

In a time of economic downturn, the Highlands “has added great uncertainty to economic activity this part of state,” he said. Senator Doherty is sure to be one of the more conservative members of the upper house.

Mr. Doherty, who has a strong belief in smaller and smaller government continued, “I would also like to see the eventual dismantling of COAH, the dismantling of beaches of New Jersey by allowing off-shore oil drilling, and maybe even the eventual dismantling of counties of Warren and Hunterdon, and the entire northwestern portion of the state.”

Finally he stated, “Perhaps an itsy bitsy government would be best at every level.”

Joey Novick can be reached via email at joeynovick@earthlink.net.

Not Just a Second Banana

2009-11-30T21:09:00.002-05:00

Twenty lieutenant governors and seconds-in-command succeeded to governor from 2000 thru November of 2009. Several of the largest states by population are lead by former lieutenant governors. An average of one in every four governors first served as lieutenant governor or first in line of succession. A study showed no other city, state or Congressional office is more successful than the office of lieutenant governor as a springboard to governor.

Bill Halter, Brad Owen, John Cherry, Becky Skillman, Barbara Lawton, Casey Cagle, Peter Kinder, Walter Dalton and James ‘Duke’ Aiona. Their names may not be familiar to you, but they are America’s last line of defense when a state’s chief executive is no longer able to lead.

They are the greatest of unknown Americans: the Lieutenant Governors.

New Jersey long scoffed at the idea of having an LG. Why have an orderly transition in the case of a gubernatorial vacancy when you can have the Senate President also be the Acting Governor? You’re saving a paycheck and office space. Plus, you won’t have to keep redecorating Drumthwacket.

While Chris Christie is becoming New Jersey’s 55th governor in January, the truly historic news is that Monmouth County Sheriff Kim Guadagno will be the first Lieutenant Governor in the history of our state. Never before has New Jersey had a permanent second-in-command, and only time will tell how that will change our politics.

The most exciting aspect of New Jersey having an LG is that New Jersey has never had a scandal involving an LG. We’ve never had federal law enforcement agents storm an LG’s office and carry away computers. No LG has ever been caught in a sex scandal, taken a bribe, or hired people for no-show jobs. It is the cleanest office in New Jersey.

While we’ve had all sorts of elected officials go to prison, no New Jersey LG has ever been behind bars.
Clean slate, so far.

Also in 2010, New Jersey will be able to take its rightful place in one of the nation’s most prestigious organizations, the National Lieutenant Governors Association. When the NLGA meets in Washington, D.C. in March to take care of important lieutenant governor business, Kim Guadagno will be there to make sure that New Jersey’s voice is heard.

What do you think the conversation is like at these meetings? “My governor lets me have full run of the mansion when he’s away, and he gave me the code on the remote control so I can watch all of the pay-movie stations.” “When he’s got a lot of meetings, my governor let’s me take his limo wherever I want to go.”

Actually, according to the NLGA’s website, lieutenant governors are making big news. Michigan LG John Cherry was highlighted for his outspoken support of the state’s new multi-species hunting package. Now, people in Michigan can get pre-approved to hunt for all sorts of animals, not just elk and deer but turkeys too. Missouri LG Peter Kinder is passing out gold, silver and bronze medals to people who take part in the “Your Heart is in Your Hands” healthy food and exercise program. North Carolina LG Walter Dalton even started a charity drive to get shoes to needy children by holding a “barefoot” press conference.
Important work for all.

So I now call on my fellow New Jerseyans to give their full support to Kim Guadagno as she looks to make her mark among the other great Americans now serving as Lieutenant Governor. And take her rightful place at the NLGA annual conference in Mississippi on July 27th-31st, 2010 at the Beau Rivage Resort.

Flemingtoon* 11.24.09 *All dialogue mostly guaranteed almost verbatim.

2009-11-24T07:22:00.001-05:00

I have a Blackberry device that I am not completely thrilled with. It’s clunky and not intuitive like an IPhone, which I would rather have. In fact, the regular message on all my Blackberry emails is “I have a Verizon Blackberry, but I would rather have an IPhone.”

While the folks at Verizon were not too happy about that, it’s my phone and I will send out the message that I want.

Anyway, the email function on the Blackberry has this spelling correction feature -- Presumptive Spelling. When generating a text or email message, I often use abbreviations. The Presumptive Spelling function “thinks” that I am misspelling certain words and will automatically change the words to what it thinks it should be.

The other day I get an email from a local Democrat in Flemington, and she [let’s go with a generic name of “Shirley”] asks me the following question:

“My husband and I were appalled to find out that State Senators and Assemblymen can still practice as lawyers when they get elected. Can Chris Christie still be a lawyer when he becomes governor? We’d thought you might know.”

So, I answered her on my Blackberry:

Shirley,

“When he becomes Governor, Christie will still be atty.” [I abbreviated ‘attorney’ as ‘atty’.]

Her answer to me seemed odd, at the time: “Not funny. Stop the jokes.”

Upon further investigation, I made a discovery.

The only thing is the Presumptive Spelling function ‘corrected’ the ‘atty’ abbreviation for me, and unbeknownst to me, I hit SEND.

The correction produced:

“When he becomes Governor, Christie will still be fatty.”

Makes me wonder what other embarrassing ‘corrections’ lurk in the Presumptive Spelling function. Now, I need to figure how to turn it off.

Murray’s Margin of Error

2009-11-07T09:03:00.002-05:00

Patrick Murray is the founding director of the Monmouth University Polling Institute. According to their website, “The Monmouth University Polling Institute has become a premier independent survey research center known for its in-depth tracking of public policy and quality of life issues.”

Murray is a frequent media commentator on politics and public opinion---in fact, one of the folks that PolitickerNJ.com asked the opinion of each week to see which gubernatorial candidate “Won The Week”. PolitickerNJ.com named him one of 14 People to Watch in New Jersey Politics in 2009. He’s got a fancy looking website, with all sorts of numbers and names, graphs and graphics, statistics and such. Polling Institute director Patrick Murray appears regularly on One-on-One with Steve Adubato, and is a frequent guest on all the shows that cover NJ political scene.

Furthermore, according to their website, “The Monmouth University Poll’s standard methodology utilizes a random digit dial (RDD) ‘probability’ sampling design to select survey participants. All telephone exchanges (i.e., area code and first three digits of the phone number) that reach a household are programmed into a computer…after interviewing is complete, the sample is ‘weighted’ to correct for the fact that some respondents are harder to reach than others…. The Monmouth University Poll either tracks or adjusts for geography, gender, race, age, and education to comport with current U.S. census figures of the adult population. This weighting ensures that findings from a sample can be generalized to the full target population.”

One would think that Mr. Murray could predict anything with extreme accuracy, given all the fancy degrees, computers, and statistics training.

But wait, there is this catch-all disclaimer on all the surveys: “All surveys are subject to ‘sampling error’ ”----you know, that “plus or minus” number at the end of the poll that tells you just how much they could be off by. “This poll has a margin of error of plus or minus 3%” or so is what you’ll hear.

Now, my background---I am just an old, bald, overweight comedian from Brooklyn, with no fancy statistics degree. I don’t have an extravagant office at Monmouth University. I am not on NJN or ‘One on One with Steve Adubato’ each week. I was not named one of PolitickerNJ’s ‘most important’ anything last year or this year. And the same will most likely be the case for next year.

My methods for predicting the results of a contest between two (or more) does not require me to spend hours and hours bothering people of all ages by phone at dinner time, and then weighting the results ‘cause I could not get enough of one type of folk or another.

I just go by my instincts. That’s right—from the gut. My keen insight. My unique sixth sense. And that insight told me the Yanks in Six.

With all his fancy training, stats, and phone calls—what was Murray’s prediction?

That the Phillies repeat.

I guess that would be a margin of error of ---“plus or minus 100%” percent.

“I was looking at the World Series through (Phillies)red-colored glasses,” opined Mr. Murray, paying off on our bet. The result: one hundred dollars from his pocket to the Hole-in-the-Wall Gang Camps for kids with cancer. And he will be sending on a jar of honey to me, too. How sweet it is.

So, the lesson: If you want accurate predictions of who will win political races in NJ, stick with Murray. (I predicted Jon Corzine by 3 points).

However, if you wish to predict the winner of any World Series where the Yankees play the Phillies, call me.

If anyone else want to donate to the Hole-in-the-Wall Gang Camps for kids with cancer, go to www.jumpforjoey.org and follow the links.

"A Keg tapped at both ends." Well, it's time to tap back.

2009-10-26T07:28:00.002-04:00

So, there you have it:

Cheese Steak vs. Hot Dog. South Bronx vs. South Philly. The Hudson vs. The Delaware. The City That Never Sleeps vs. The City of Brotherly Love. The Statue of Liberty vs. The Liberty Bell. Philadelphia Daily News vs. The New York Daily News.

Where WC Fields once said, “I once spent a year in Philadelphia, I think it was on a Sunday. ” And Jay Leno once said, “The crime problem in New York is getting really serious. The other day the Statue of Liberty had both hands up. ”

And just where is New Jersey with all of this? Just as Ben Franklin said, “A keg tapped at both ends”.

Well, it’s time to tap back.

What state will NY Yankees fans and Phillies fans have to pass through? Us. What roads will they have to travel on to get to their respective stadiums between now and next weekend? Ours. Which bathrooms will they be using if they drink too beer much at a game? Which gas stations will they use to fill up their tanks? Ours, that’s whose. Forget ‘Pay to Play’:

New Rule: “Pay to Pass Through.”

Set up EZPass to detect the Phillies ‘P’ and the Yankees ‘NY’ and quadruple the tolls. Charge them to use the bathrooms. If a Yankees and/or Phillies fans stops here for gas, charge’em a ‘pump your own gas’ surcharge. If they stop to eat in a NJ restaurant, add a World Series travel fee.

We have state debt in New Jersey, and now’s our shot to have help from Yankees and/or Phillies fans pay it down.

So, raise your beer to Ben Franklin: He had the right idea. He was just a century or two too early. And just had no way to pay for it.

(In the interest of complete disclosure, Ben would have most likely been a Phillies fan, where as I am a life-long Yankees fan. Prediction: Yanks in six.)

I Am New Genius

2009-10-02T07:14:00.000-04:00

Over the past year, due to the illness of a family member, I had not been as involved in the local politics of my hometown of Flemington, as I would have liked. So this year, with the gubernatorial race in full throttle as well as local Council races needing a helping hand, I went to a local meeting of Democrats in Hunterdon County.

Now, the thing about Democrats in Hunterdon County is this: they are very dedicated souls, and true ‘blue’ to the core. If you’re a Democrat in this very Republican County, you’re REALLY a Democrat. There is no reason to be a Democrat here except for a true belief on the party of Wilson, Roosevelt, Kennedy, and Clinton.

Such is the case with Reyna and Irving Zelinsky. Great Democrats, always willing to help canvass, donate, host events, and phone bank during election time. I called upon them a lot, and they never say ‘no’.

The Zelinskys, now both American citizens, were originally from Czechoslovakia coming here as a couple in the 60s, forty years ago. They both speak English now, albeit with a Czechoslovakian accent. I met this couple about six years ago during a local Flemington campaign, when they asked me for help with a Motor Vehicle Commission matter. Seems that when they moved from NYC to New Jersey, there was some issue with switching Irving’s drivers license. He was getting the runaround in both New Jersey and New York, and was very frustrated. I made a few phone calls to both offices, and was able straighten out a simple bureaucratic mess. And we became friends through politics.

Upon my arrival at the meeting, I was very glad to see the Zelinskys. I had not seen them much in the last year or so, and was glad to run into them at this party meeting at the home of the local Democratic chair. Reyna and Irving never failed to call me “Mr. Novick”, and my ongoing joke was, “Mr. Novick, that’s my father. Call me Joey.”

Hugs all around, and Reyna says to me in her Czechoslovakian-accented English, “Mister Novick! How are you? I’m glad you’re here.” I make my usual joke, and say hello to Irving, too.

Then Reyna continues, “Mr. Novick, I missed you. Your new genius. I was just talking Irving the other day. I miss your new genius come election time.”

Well, I was very moved by this seemingly very moving complement. I've worked hard on elections, won more than I lost in this very Republican town, but never thought of myself as a ‘genius’. I attributed the term ‘new genius’ to her sometime misunderstanding of American idiomatic expressions. However, I thanked her anyway.

“Reyna, that is very kind of you, but we all work hard on elections in order to win. I am hardly a ‘genius’ or a ‘new genius’. I learn from everybody…I”.

Then she interrupts me and asks, “What are you mean ‘genius’? What?”

I am uncomfortable at her question, but try to laugh it off. “I think we are all geniuses—when we are working hard…”. Just then she turns to her husband, and she says something in her native language. He says something back, and they both start laughing together. Irving, laughing, tries to explain.

“Mr. Novick, Reyna didn’t say ‘new genius’. She said she misses your (he pauses to speak slowly)…she misses, we miss your ‘nudgey-ness’. The way during election time you call for meeting. You call for phone banks. Put sign up. Everyday you call. Help out with seniors. Help out at office. You’re a nudge. Your nudgey-ness. This we missed. Nudgey-ness.”

I smile, laugh and thank them again. However, I am humbled.

But, I know in my heart that one does have to be somewhat of a genius out here in Hunterdon to win as a Democrat, be a nudge, and still keep your sense of humor.

And make new friends like the Zelinskys.

GOP Recruits Serena Williams to Run for Congress After Profane Outburst.

2009-09-13T08:16:00.002-04:00

"This is our kind of candidate we need running for Congress", says RNC Chairman Michael Steele.

"Can you imagine her at the next State of the Union address? Oba...ma won't be able to handle the 'F%#K Y%u!' she uses in her serves, or the 'A##hole!' she has in her baseline game. He's toast!"

Manners of the Members and the Top Eight Rejected Obama Heckle Response

2009-09-10T21:27:00.002-04:00

Congressman Joe Wilson may be number one in South Carolina’s 2nd district, but Wednesday he clearly stepped in Number Two. If you heckle the president during a speech and you’re not a Congressman, you’ll usually be removed by Capitol Building police. However, if you are a member of the House, your behavior will only help your opponent raise money.

Wilson’s likely Democratic opponent has raised nearly $200,000 per word. Thus according to www.examiner.com, “Cash is still pouring in for Rob Miller, the Iraq war veteran and Democrat poised to challenge the infamously uncouth South Carolina Republican Joe Miller in next year’s House election.”

This is a great fundraising idea. Put President Obama on tour ---“Go ahead: Call Me A Liar 2009”----speaking in close districts where there is a Republican Congressman. Get the Congressman to call Obama names, and then watch the campaign contributions roll in.

Update: Not to be outdone, after Joe Wilson shouted out “You lie!”, California Congressman Jerry Lewis yelled out “Hey, Lady!”, and New Jersey’s own Rush Holt, yelled out an explanation of “the Unified Field Theory”

Top Eight Rejected Obama Heckle Responses: As a comedian, I have been periodically heckled in comedy clubs. It’s always good to have some responses in the can. Here are some that we know Chief of Staff Rahm Emanuel suggested to President Obama, but the President wisely rejected:

1- “Obviously the Congressman is auditioning for Blue Collar Comedy Tour."

2- 'It's alright, folks, I remember the first time I had a beer.'

3- 'If I wanted to hear from an asshole, I would have farted.

4- 'Hey Congressman, so I guess there was no tractor pull tonight in South Carolina?

5- ‘Hey, Congressman. This is my job. I don't show up at your job and unplug the Slurpee machine.'

6- “Billions of sperm cells, and yours is the one that won.”

7- “Congressman, if I want anymore shit out of you, I’ll squeeze your head.

8- "I guess it’s true what they say about the South--it is a shame when cousins marry."

2009-09-10T07:16:00.007-04:00

Recent crime reports have indicated two important trends in New Jersey: Violent crime is down; however, non-violent crime is up. Perhaps this second trend is directly attributable to the recently discovered driving record of gubernatorial candidate Chris Christie.

Mr. Christie has worked all summer trying to score points in the race for governor. And racing he has been doing: Between 1985 and 2000 Christie was found guilty on 10 tickets totaling 25 points on his license. Wonder what HIS insurance rates must be? Oh, I forgot ----at times, he has had no insurance, like at his stop in Lambertville.

So, that got me thinking---Christie is asking us to let him drive the New Jersey bus. But, would you trust him with your kids on a school bus? Is his driving record good enough for him to get a job driving a school bus in New Jersey?

Let’s see…if you go online, and Google ‘school bus driver’, you get hundreds of hits. So, there are plenty of jobs out there. I found one school in Old Bridge, with the following requirements:

Current driver's license required with no more that 3 moving violations in past three years (no alcohol or drug related convictions)
CPR and First Aid certification required
2+ years of experience transporting children highly desirable.

Christie has 25 points from 1985 to 2000----but none in the past three years. So, he is OK, there.

Don’t know if he is “CPR and First Aid certification required”. But when he got into an accident with a motorcycle rider, the rider did end up in the hospital. So, maybe Christie is not “CPR and First Aid certified”.

And finally, he does have experience driving kids around to ball games, etc. Thumbs up there.

When Christie down to give testimony to Congress over the summer, he left early because he had to take the train back. Perhaps he could have stayed longer had he driven down to DC. But with his driving record, maybe taking Amtrak was a good idea.

So, the jury is still out. Would you trust Chris Christie driving your kids in a school bus in the morning?

Wing Man: How I survived three days of Right-Wing peace, love and music.

2009-08-22T08:26:00.016-04:00

Part One: Gorillas in the Missed

In the 1970s, Dian Fossey spent a great deal of time living in a habitat with mountain gorillas in Rwanda, in an effort to learn all about their way of life. She wanted to separate the truth about the mountain gorilla from the Hollywood "King Kong" myth of an aggressive, savage beast.

I was very inspired by her story, and so I decided to do the same thing. Just not with gorillas, though.

Last weekend, I spent three days of ‘peace, love and music’ with that very rare animal in New Jersey, the Republican-Conservative-Libertarian (herein after referred to as the ‘RCLs’). I wanted to separate the truth about the RCLs from the national political rhetorical myth of being passionless, humorless, narrow-minded, and not-very-bright politicos. Nothing could be further from the truth. Most are bright, spirited, passionate, insightful folks, whose values very largely differ from mine, as well as other Left of center Democrats. Oh, they have plenty of whackos, for sure. But ALL of the RCLs should be not defined by those whackos.

While the Daily Kos Netroots Nation conference was happening at the Westin Convention Center in downtown Pittsburgh, just across one of the Three Rivers, the Americans for Prosperity (AFP) were holding their own counter-conference---the RightOnline Conference. This is where, at the Station Square Sheraton Hotel, the RCLs gathered with their ilk for some information, inspiration, and instruction from the likes of commentator/blogger Michelle Malkin, economist Stephen Moore, Bush tax-cuts creator Grover Norquist, and (even) Joe The Plumber---just some of the aforementioned RCL whackos.

I decided to go for the full-tilt-boogie RCL experience: I traveled with them. I stayed in a hotel with them. I ate meals with them. I hung out in between sessions and ‘joked’ with them. Yes, that is right---

Contrary to popular belief; the RCLs do have a sense of humor. They cracked jokes about Gore (“Yup, he invented the Internet…..and Global Warming.”); President Obama (“The Anointed One even needs a teleprompter to take a dump.”); and the Netroots Nation people across the three rivers (“We can tell where the Left-Wingers

are---from the smoke haze above Pittsburgh---they’re all smoking dope, wearing tie-dye and singing ‘Kumbaya’”.) Well, maybe, that last observation is not too far off.

I rode with them on their AFP bus from New Jersey, leaving bright and early at 7am in Bordentown, NJ, and picking up several other Pennsylvania

RCLs along the way in King of Prussia. After that stop, we were on our way to Steel City. While I was disappointed that Mr. AFP-NJ himself ---Steve Lonegan ---was not on the bus, I was treated to a plethora of various RCLs of different species during the six-hour plus ride. Some were more CL than R. However, all seem to be pro-life, anti-marriage equality, anti-any tax, and all solid Reaganistas. And they were all on the bus to fight against health care, cap and trade, and any further bailouts.

I seem to ‘fit’ in just fine. Being fat, bald, and white-bearded, I seem to ‘blend’ in just fine. It did not hurt that I know many of the required RCL ‘buzz words’, and know my Constitution fairly well.

No one asked me about my politics----which I would have shared gladly. At one point, however, I was asked who I voted for in the presidential primary. I declared that “I hold my secret ballot sacred, but I will tell you one thing: I did not vote for John McCain.” Nodding knowingly, she said, "Neither did I."

Like out of a Hollywood casting call, there were RCLs of every shape and size. While the names here are not going to be changed to protect the innocent---these folks were hardily innocent---I will, respectfully, just use initials.

There was ‘M’, a very religious Evangelical Christian who carried a photo book of a trip he made to see Bush speak in New Jersey a few years back. In a conversation we had about the Iraq War.

He made to see Bush speak in New Jersey a few years back. In a conversation we had about the Iraq War. I asserted that I was opposed to the war (in part), because there was never a formal declaration of war under Article I, Section 8 of the Constitution. For that ‘infraction of conscience’, he actually reported me to the bus captain as being opposed to ‘peace through strength’. Really. More on 'M', later.

There was chain-smoking ‘R’, a newly elected Republican State Committee member, who was furious that his State Committee refused to adopt the Pro-Life/Anti-Gay RNC National Platform. There was ‘D’, a 40ish former media professional, who hated Affirmative Action, who asked me, “What’s the problem with those people? We have a black president? What else do those people want?”

There was ‘N’, a teacher who was a former Liberal Democrat (‘LibDem’ was the self-describing term she used), who was converted over the airwaves by the magic of Rush Limbaugh. She now argues regularly with her brother, a solid ‘LibDem’. She said she was in a quandary over his assertion that “healthcare is a right, like ‘police protection, and an education.’”

For the next twenty minutes we looked diligently at the Constitution copies we had been given, trying to figure the whole thing out.

I came up with the idea health care was a ‘right’ under the “promote the general welfare” assertion in the Preamble. And that the "cruel and unusual punishment" clause of the 8th Amendment to the Constitution had been interpreted by the Supreme Court to require prisoners, as part of their humane treatment during detention, to be guaranteed the right to health care under ESTELLE v. GAMBLE, 429, U.S. 97, 1976. “And certainly citizens have rights greater than that of prisoners,” I said, to which all nodded.

“...So, it must be a ‘right’. And, after all, what more important way to ‘promote the general welfare’ than promoting the ‘health’ of the populace. And it’s so important, the Founding Framers chose to put it up front.”

This did not sit well with ‘M’, the former LibDem. Fighting against government health care was the reason she was on this bus. I got that “Deer in the Headlights” look from her.

I would get that look periodically through the weekend from several other RCLs.

More later, in Part Two: Lonegan and the Conference.

Read ALL about what happened yesterday!

2009-08-18T06:59:00.002-04:00

Here is the news round-up from Monday. Why waste your Monday looking at the news of the day, when you can relax and read it tomorrow:
News Roundup & Open Thread for Monday, Aug. 17, 2009

At RightOnlIne Conference

2009-08-14T14:54:00.002-04:00

I am at the Right OnLine Conference, and just got a brief POV on the overall conference from the Timothy Lee, Director of Legal and Public Affairs for the Center for Individual Freedom.

Right now, I am in the Patients First, Healthcare Reform forum. The guy speaking compared the Cash for Clunkers program with Obama's approach on healthcare----Government thinks that expendable, people are expendable, the Constitution is expendable...this is the way the Obama adminstration thinks..."

I Read The News Yesterday, Oh Boy....

2009-08-12T07:04:00.004-04:00

Many of the New Jersey blogs and political websites try to “out news” each other in the mega early of the morning with features like “News Roundup & Open Thread” (BlueJersey) Or Wake-Up Call –(PolitickerNJ).

These folks get up waaaay too early, don’t have breakfast with their loved ones, leave the house a mess, and gather news from web-news sources and newspaper websites (who probably have people who get up even earlier to gather the news around the state). They care about you that much to make sure you get the news immediately, and as early as possible. Oooh, Politigasm.

Reminds me of the old joke about Jews in Florida: “They eat dinner at 4:30pm, lunch at 11am, and dinner the night before.”

They scan websites from every source and site from north to the south; from east to west, from the cyber to the historical—teetering-on-the-edge-of-demise dailies like the Star-Ledger, Asbury Park Press, Bergen Record, Courier News, Courier Post. From weeklies, monthlies, and magazines. From other websites and even each other. They link back to these stories with clever little lines like “Christie is a jerk” or “Teabaggers stage protest”. Or “Joey Novick is funny and brilliant.” Bigger, faster, stronger.

All in pursuit of all the news that fits we print. Or blog.

So, in order to make it even easier for you, the daily blog reader, each day I am going to try to do the same thing. Link back to the news. But make it even easier for you. I will link back to everyone else’s news round-up----but not until they’re done, usually the next day. The news does not change that much from day to day, anyway. “Christie is a jerk”. “Teabaggers stage protest”. Or “Joey Novick is funny and brilliant.” Yada yada yada.

That way, I can be done more quickly, and sleep later. Or have breakfast. Or take an exercise walk. Here is the news from yesterday. Tomorrow, we should have today's news. Thanks to Rosi and Laura.

PolitickerNJ Wake-up Call from Tuesday, August 11th

Blue Jersey News Round up Tuesday, August 11th

...also, if you missed it, Lincoln lost New Jersey.

Steve Lonegan anti-Cap and Trade Road Show

2009-08-11T06:53:00.004-04:00

Went to see the Steve Lonegan anti-Cap and Trade Road Show last night. This one in Clinton, in the heart of conservative-right wing-libertarian Lonegan country.

Packed house for the usual right-wing debunking of the global warming "myth/conspiracy". On hand, of course, was Assemblyman Mike Doherty, the original anti-global warming zealot.

Packed house—all the usual Republicans were there: Hunterdon Chairman Kuhl (no question with a name like that he be opposed to global warming); the aforementioned Mike Doherty, who had his own anti-global warming road show while back---the one where he was asked if he believed in evolution, and he said, “It does not matter. Evolution or creationism. It just does not matter.” Erik Peterson, the winner of the political sweepstakes shift when Leonard Lance won his seat in Congress.

Missing were State Senator Marcia Karrow and Congressman Lance, himself.

Lance has always been a good thinker, and an independent legislator, by and large. No doubt he is a Republican by philosophy, geography and family lineage ----however in a district that went big time for Lonegan in the gubernatorial primary, he may be shifting too far to the center to suit some of the RLC* folks –*Republican Conservative-Libertarian. His vote for Cap -n- Trade was one of the few Republican votes in Congress. Three from NJ, so he was not alone. But the usually popular Lance got booed last night.

Much of the anti-Cap and Trade was based on their “proof” that climate change does not exist. Debunking Al Gore’s “An Inconvenient Truth” with stories by John Stossell about how a photo of a polar bear was taken in August; how the whole global warming conspiracy can be traced somehow to Goldman Sachs, who would make billions on Cap n Trade; and how their science (which comes from ‘objective’ sources like The Heritage Foundation) was just seeking The Truth.

Anyway, 250 or so angry folks sat and listened to Lonegan, who cracked jokes (“Proof of climate change for me is the change in women’s lingerie over the years.”), asserted that Friends of The Earth and the Sierra Club were “communist front groups” (Are you listening Comrade Tittle?) and got cued-boos when he mentioned Obama, Gore, or Lance.

By way, maybe the liberalism is catching: Congressman Lance and Al Gore both went to the same law school, Vanderbilt University Law School.

Anyway, if any of the folks there did not see “An Inconvenient Truth”, it is now available on DVD.

Cap and Trade is what the Republicans always say they want: tax incentives to promote environmental protection, rather than government regulation.

2009 NJ Powerlessness List

2009-08-07T06:26:00.002-04:00

You may have noticed that PolitickerNJ recently posted their own Power List for 2009. Their list identifies New Jersey’s 100 most politically influential personalities. People whose phone calls get returned. People whose advice everyone seeks. People who get interviewed by CNN, Fox News, and the Star-Ledger. The Ultra-Movers and Uber-Shakers.

Well, I’ll have none of that for my list. This list identifies the most politically non-influential personalities. On my list, I don’t worry about some arbitrary number like “100”. While PolitickerNJ eliminated current office holders, former governors, former senators---we’ve eliminated no one.

If you no longer matter in New Jersey, you matter to me.

We include anyone and everyone whose phone calls don’t get returned, Those who never get invited anywhere anymore. Those with whom photos would be a death knell in any election campaign.

As opposed to the PolitickerNJ 2009 Power List, our method was scientific, empirical, data-driven, objective---and any other super cool words used by Ben Dworkin or the folks at Eagleton.

And while there are no right or wrong answers, this list changes from moment to moment---just like 'realpolitics'. As a matter of fact, when you started reading this list, you were on the list. But because you have taken out time to read this very important stuff, you’re now too important to be on the list. Puff, you’re gone.

We welcome your comments. Contact me at joeynovick@earthlink.net. And if you’re unimportant and un-influential enough, I won’t respond to your email.

So here goes:

14-20- Former [and soon to be former Mayors] Peter Cammarano, Anthony Suarez, and Dennis Elwell used to wield much power, albeit some for a longer time than others. Now, not so much. [I am leaving space for at least five others ‘soon to be former elected officials’ to fill out the list]

13 Golan Cipal—Then: He brought down a governor, and was the punchline to comedy club jokes. Now: He has a website explaining “his side” of the story. www.GolanCipal.com, still under construction.

12-Craig Carton—the former 101.5 personality once was able to make state legislators fear for their political lives. PolitickerNJ.com named him the 9th most politically influential personality in the State of New Jersey in 2007. Now, like every other guy, he just talks sports in the morning.

11-Dina Matos McGreevey – Then: The Queen of Drumthwacket. She appeared on Oprah. Now: Her book is on the quarter rack at .99 stores.

10-Mike Ferguson – The golden boy of New Jersey’s right-wing spent eight years in the halls of Congress, and his most notable achievement was successfully retrieving his congressional pin from a co-ed at a Georgetown bar. One day: He’ll be the answer to a Jersey Jeopardy question: Who beat Tom Kean, Jr. in a primary for a seat in Congress?

9-Mayor Henry Franco – There’s nothing negative to report on the mayor of Deal, other than the fact that he’s so unknown that some of his constituents, namely a group of Syrian Jewish rabbis, seemed to have more influence in Trenton than he does.

8-Steve Lonegan – There’s an old saying that someone is so unknown that they couldn’t even get arrested in this town. Well, Lonegan did once get arrested for protesting ---- outside a Corzine town hall meeting, but that may be the end of his public theatrics and criminal record.

7-Sarah Palin- she has a string of ‘formers’ now added to her resume. Now the former Mayor-Beauty Queen-Governor-VP Loser can’t even get Chris Christie to invite her to NJ.

6-Sharpe James – He once wielded strong power in the state senate and ran our state’s biggest city with an iron fist. But now, the imprisoned former mayor of Newark is mostly concerned with protecting his own southward.

5- The Star-Ledger –this once mighty newspaper laid off so many experienced reporters, that they are a thinner, paler version of their former selves. Still, they carry my favorite strip, Doonesbury.

4-Randall Pinkett- Once the heir apparent to the coveted LG spot, “The Apprentice” champ Pinkett was replaced by feisty Jewish grandmother Loretta Weinberg before you could say, “You’re fired!”.

3-The “In The Lobby.com” guys – Their emails are boring, and they have too many ads. Never seen a scoop there at all. Hey, I write for the PolitickerNJ team. What did you expect?

2-Chairman of the Hudson County Republican Party. Pathetic. Not even the Republican State Committee knew who he was. There’s standing room only at the courtrooms where Democratic officeholders are being arraigned, and this guy can’t even field a softball team let alone a slate of candidates. The statue of Lou Costello in Paterson wields more influence.

But there is one person who is the least influential politico in New Jersey politics and that’s…

1-Me – I’m in Hunterdon County. Getting votes delivered? I can’t even get a pizza delivered. I'll be lucky if I can stop a street naming after Dick Cheney. There’s an old saying in politics. Those who can, do. Those who can’t, write sarcastic blogs about those who can.

The definition of irony: “an incongruity or discordance between what one says or does.”

2009-08-06T07:04:00.005-04:00

Like a school crossing guard who crosses in between, and not at the green, the Government Records Council (GRC) ---the folks who were created to enforce the Open Public Records Act---found themselves on the wrong side of the law. No irony in that.

In July, a Mercer County gave props to the fine folks at the New Jersey Foundation for Open Government (NJFOG), and ordered the GRC to provide full copies of requested emails in unredacted form. In the interest of full disclosure, I must reveal that this blogger is on the state board of NJFOG.

Details, details: NJFOG was trying to get the names and email contact information for people who had filed complaints with the GRC, with the attempt to contacts those folks to help them further, if need be. Good folks those NJFOG people, if I must say so myself.

GRC’s claim: That “it was protecting complainants' privacy by shielding their home e-mail addresses.”

NJFOG: was trying to "evaluate and monitor the GRC's performance in handling individual complaints."

NJFOG filed suit on May 8, alleging that was a violation of OPRA, the common law right of access to public records, and N.J.S.A. 1:1-14.1(a), which provides a right of access to quasi-judicial records of administrative agencies.

Winner: NJFOG.

Thanks to attorney Richard Gutman, who “analogizes the GRC's effort to withhold the addressees to the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission ‘violating the law against discrimination.’”

And she told the media: ''How about, in honor of the American soldier, you quit makin' things up?''

2009-07-27T07:25:00.003-04:00

...and "How about, in honor of the American soldier, you quit makin' things up?" too, ex-governor?

Palin's lies.....

Palin lied when she said the dismissal of her public safety commissioner, Walt Monegan, had nothing to do with his refusal to fire state trooper Mike Wooten; in fact, the Branchflower Report concluded that she repeatedly abused her power when dealing with both men.

Palin lied when she repeatedly claimed to have said, "Thanks, but no thanks" to the Bridge to Nowhere; in fact, she openly campaigned for the federal project when running for governor.

Palin lied when she denied that Wasilla's police chief and librarian had been fired; in fact, both were given letters of termination the previous day.

Palin lied when she wrote in the NYT that a comprehensive review by Alaska wildlife officials showed that polar bears were not endangered; in fact, email correspondence between those scientists showed the opposite.

Palin lied when she claimed in her convention speech that an ~~oil~~ gas pipeline "began" under her guidance; in fact, the pipeline was years from breaking ground, if at all.

Palin lied when she told Charlie Gibson that she does not pass judgment on gay people; in fact, she opposes all rights between gay spouses and belongs to a church that promotes conversion therapy.

Palin lied when she denied having said that humans do not contribute to climate change; in fact, she had previously proclaimed that human activity was not to blame.

Palin lied when she claimed that Alaska produces 20 percent of the country's domestic energy supply; in fact, the actual figures, based on any interpretation of her words, are much, much lower.

Palin lied when she told voters she improvised her convention speech when her teleprompter stopped working properly; in fact, all reports showed that the machine had functioned perfectly and that her speech had closely followed the script.

Palin lied when she recalled asking her daughters to vote on whether she should accept the VP offer; in fact, her story contradicts details given by her husband, the McCain campaign, and even Palin herself. (She later added another version.)

Palin lied when she claimed to have taken a voluntary pay cut as mayor; in fact, as councilmember she had voted against a raise for the mayor, but subsequent raises had taken effect by the time she was mayor.

Palin lied when she insisted that Wooten's divorce proceedings had caused his confidential records to become public; in fact, court officials confirmed they released no such records.

Palin lied when she suggested to Katie Couric that she was involved in trade missions with Russia; in fact, she has never even met with Russian officials.

Palin lied when she told Shimon Peres that the only flag in her office was the Israeli flag; in fact, she has several flags.

Palin lied when she claimed to have tried to divest government funds from Sudan; in fact, her administration openly opposed a bill that would have done just that.

Palin lied when she repeatedly claimed that troop levels in Iraq were back to pre-surge levels; in fact, even she acknowledged her "misstatements," though she refused to retract or apologize.

Palin lied when she insisted that the Branchflower Report "showed there was no unlawful or unethical activity on my part"; in fact, that report prominently stated, "Palin abused her power by violating Alaska Statute 39.52.110(a) of the Alaska Executive Branch Ethics Act."

Palin lied when she claimed to have voiced concerns over Wooten fearing he would harm her family; in fact, she actually decreased her security detail during that period.

Palin lied when asked about the $150,000 worth of clothes provided by the RNC; in fact, solid reporting contradicted several parts of her statement.

Palin lied when she suggested that she had offered the media proof of her pregnancy with Trig to "correct the record"; in fact, no reports of her medical records were ever published; and the letter from her doctor testifying to her good health only emerged hours before polling ended on election day, even though there was nothing in it that couldn't have been released two months earlier.

Palin lied when she said that "reported" allegations of her banning Harry Potter as mayor was easily refutable because it had not even been written yet; in fact, the first book in that series was published in 1998 - two years into her first term - and such rumors were never reported by the media, only circulated as emails.

Palin lied when she denied having participated in a clothes audit with campaign laywers; in fact, the Washington Times later confirmed those details.

Palin lied when asked about Couric's question regarding her reading habits; in fact, Couric's words were not, "What do you read up there in Alaska?" or anything close to condescension.

Palin lied when she mischaracterized the "$1200 check" given to Alaskans as the permanent fund dividend check; in fact, that fund had yielded $2,069 per person, and she claimed otherwise to obscure the fact that Alaskans also received a $1200 rebate check from a windfall profits tax on oil companies - a tax widely criticized by Republicans.

Palin lied when she claimed to be unaware of a turkey being slaughtered behind her during a filmed interview; in fact, the cameraman said she had picked the spot herself, while the slaughter was underway.

Palin lied when she denied having rejected federal stimulus money; in fact, she continued to accept and reject the funds several times.

Palin lied when she claimed that legislative leaders had canceled a meeting with her to hold their own press conference; in fact, they only canceled it after being told she would not participate, and the purpose of the press conference was very different from the meeting's.

Palin lied when she announced on the news that she never holds closed-door meetings; in fact, she had just attended a closed-door meeting with the legislature earlier that day.

Palin lied when she said that former aide John Bitney's "amicable" departure was for "personal" reasons; in fact, Bitney said he was fired because of his relationship with the wife of Palin's friend, plus a Palin spokesperson later claimed "poor job performance" for his firing - without elaborating.

Palin lied when she said she kept her running injury a secret on the campaign trail; in fact, her bandaged hand was clearly visible in photographs and the story was widely talked about.

Palin lied when she claimed that Alaska has spent "millions of dollars" on litigation related to her ethics complaints; in fact, that figure is much, much lower, and she had initiated the most expensive inquiry.

Palin lied when she denied that the Alaska Independence Party supports secession and denied that her husband had been a member; in fact, even the McCain campaign noted that the party's very existence is based on secession and that Todd was a member for seven years.

Landslide District? Slim chance of Changing power.

2009-07-07T22:40:00.002-04:00

With candidates winning in some districts with 60%, 70% or even 80% of the vote---just how much true democracy do we really have? If the majority party in a district ---whether Rs or Ds---has voter registration levels that produce winners each and every time, can we truly say that is a fair and democratic system.

Sure, the voter has a choice. But with districts being ‘cut’ with a clear majority, does that voter’s vote really mean that much? This is called ‘landsliding’. And it has gotten worse over time.

According to Governing.com, “In 1976, when Jimmy Carter was elected president, less than a quarter of the American people lived in so-called "landslide counties" — those in which the spread between the two major presidential candidates was 20 percentage points or more. By 2004, when George W. Bush was reelected, nearly half the electorate lived in this kind of politically tilted territory.”

For democracy, so it goes.

Bailout of Madoff Not Making Everyone Happy

2009-07-03T07:57:00.003-04:00

Special to AP Newswire

With 700 billion dollars being spent on the General Motors bailout, AIG, and many other financial institutions, “the money is flowing from Washington like sh*t through a goose”, as described by one “Congressman from the 3rd district of Alabama”, who asked not to be named.

“In the 1980s, I solved the whole dang Alabama state financial crisis myself when I was Calhoun County Commissioner with good Republican principles…that’s the d*mn truth. You can look it up. Give me ten minutes, and then go check Wikipedia.”

At least one blogger was not happy with current government bailout plans: “Bernie Madoff is getting his share of the government bailout in the form of 150 year’s worth of housing, three square meals a day, and full medical coverage. What’s this country coming to?”, posted blogger Spanky182 at www.Whatsthiscountrycomingto?.com. “I can understand a year or two until he gets back on his feet, but this is ridiculous.

However, the Madoff bailout had no effect on the housing market nationally: As the government was providing Madoff with lifetime housing, they also seized his wife’s penthouse apartment, “…an even swap, with a net effect of zero on the housing market,” one DC official was quoted as saying.

On the job

2009-06-27T18:19:00.002-04:00

Strangely enough, a politician who wants to get a little nookie on the side while he is in office can’t win no matter what they do. The latest to test this theory was Governor Mark Sanford from South Carolina.

If you’ve been following the news, you may know that “Hiking the Appalachian Trail” is a new Southern euphemism for “getting laid”.

Sanford traveled all the way to South America get his nookie, apparently.

At least the others in the US: Spitzer got his in Washington, DC; McGreevey stayed at NJ highway rest stops for his.

And President Bill Clinton stayed on the job by getting his right in the Oval Office. If nuclear launch codes were needed, Clinton was still right there will and ready to be the leader of the free world.

Not so Sanford. He was out of town during his affair.

Unreachable by his staff, the press and the people of South Carolina. He met his paramour on a trip a year ago paid for by the South Carolina Department of Commerce---the taxpayers kicked in for that one. To his credit, the governor did offer to pay back the state for that portion of the trip where he had the affair. I guess any days where he failed to get laid, he’s not paying for. Good sport, governor.

Under the South Carolina State constution, Article IV, SECTION 2. “Qualifications of Governor”:

No person shall be eligible to the office of Governor who denies the existence of the Supreme Being.

So, if when he was getting his nookie, the good governor did not shout out the Lord’s name, perhaps he can get impeached.

The New new New York Yankee Stadium

2009-06-09T07:12:00.004-04:00

So, what do you think of the new Yankee Stadium? Yeah, me, too.
5:39 AM Apr 22nd from web.

So, about six weeks ago I got up at 5:39am and wrote the above update on Twitter. I was cynical about the new Yankee Stadium, nostalgic for the old one, and ticked off about $2500 corporate seats. Well, last night I went to the new Yankee Stadium, and I was impressed. The fan experience was truly wonderful. Although prices were pricey [hot dog $6, beer in a commemorative plastic cup, $10, french fries $6]----that was something I expected. Parking was $19, something else I expected. But I walked away actually having fun. Yanks won 5-3, with four Yankee home runs.

The Yankees seemed to have learned a lesson from minor league teams: fan fun is what it is all about. The silly games played on the jumbo tron. Fan guessing games. The players making security announcements.

As the old Yankeee Stadium looks on, the new Yankee Stadium takes over. Sad and wonderful at the same time.

So, nu? The New Family discusses marriage-equality...

2009-06-05T00:12:00.009-04:00

“Hello, Jersey? It’s your cousin, Hampshire. How are you, darling? How is your Garden? How’s your Shore?

"Dear, I want to thank you for your nice gift on the occasion of my getting ‘Marriage-Equality’. The tomatoes were fabulous! Nice and big and ripe. You really are the Garden State of the New family….”

“So, are you and York still having your troubles? Look, you really need to get over that whole 'Statue of Liberty' thing. It’s been going on for years, and the Statue really does belong to York. The gift from France was for New York, and not you. (Oy, not this again). Yes, I know the gift was for all the States…(and again with the 'it's closer to me' whine)... Maybe you and York could just get together over a nice lunch, but really….(oy vey, I am sorry I brought it up)….she is your sister state and your neighbor, and you really need to forgive….”

“Look, the real reason I called is to see what’s happening with you in the ‘marriage-equality’ department. You know, you’re not getting any younger. I was with the Norths the other day----you know Carolina and Dakota----oh, they’re fine. Y’know, Carolina never shuts up and you can’t understand a thing she says ----with that accent of hers, and Dakota never says a word. But they were asking about you, dear…."

“Y’know, it is about time you got marriage-equality. It really is better for you. No, that ‘domestic partnership’ nonsense just does not work. Sounds like a law firm. And no one knows what it is. And the ‘civil unions’ ----hey, why buy the cow if you can get the milk for free, know what I mean….marriage-equality is the only way to go….

“Now your mishuguna cousin California from the other side of the States----can’t make up her mind. First she has marriage-equality, then she doesn’t. Then she has it again. Oy, what tsoris she’s causing!...."

“Now, you should see the way I look since I got marriage-equality…my pastures are greener…my mountains look bigger and my lakes are bluer. You need to try it. All my neighbors have marriage-equality--- Connecticut. Maine. Massachusetts. Vermont. It will work for you, too, dear. Trust me, it’s so much better..."

"Even your goyish-a cousin, Iowa has marriage-equality. Who knew?”

(a special shout out to Steven and Daniel)

Americans for Prosperity conference

2009-06-04T06:50:00.006-04:00

Second to none in the Republican world are the folks from Americans for Prosperity (AFP). These conservatoids march to the beat of a different drummer on their side of the political aisle.

Their leader in New Jersey is none other than former gubernatorial candidate Steve Lonegan. Now, this time around he was taken a bit more seriously by the Republican powers that be and they actually ran attack-commercials against him touting his 'flat-tax' as a scam to raise taxes on "70% of New Jersey residents" which "Lonegan actually admitted to the Philadelphia Inquirer". Yup, folks---if you're gonna raise taxes on New Jersey residents go out of state to admit it. Now, the flat tax, as I hear tell it would have raised taxes on the lowest level income folks in NJ.

And Lonegan said that was OK 'cause it was "not really that much" (an additional $400 per year or so"), and that the money would be used to help create jobs and stimulate the economy. Now, let me understand this----you're going to help create jobs and stimulate the NJ economy with tax dollars? Is not that what President Obama is attempting to do with federal stimulus money? And Steve is just willing to do it with poor people's money----but not rich people's apparently. Maybe the rich are different. Their money is no good here.

Anyway, the AFP folks included Lonegan, and Joe Schlip (Piscataway Republican Club guy and the guy they chose to introduce their keynote speaker, Curtis Sliwa) who is pro-life to the nth degree, against marriage equality, and told me he believes that Islamists are taking over Europe and if we did not do something in America we would be an "Islamist Republic" in years to come. Well, his exact time frame was 25 years, so I have got 2024 marked on my calendar for the ocassion. Joe, you can pick up your tin-foil hat at the next AFP convention.

It was fun as I got to meet Ryan, the 22 year-old conservative true believer who was staffing a table for the conference. A firece conservative-libertarian, Ryan wants the government out of his life completely----even to the point of not wanting any local zoning boards making sure that an oil refinery could not be zoned next to his house. "My freedom is important to me," he said. "If that means losing the value of my home, that's OK with me." Perhaps Ryan can purchase his home in Joe Schlip's future America from the folks from the future Islamist Republic----and wear his own tin-foil hat during the house closing.

At the AFP Con, I got to meet Curtis Sliwa, who I miss broadcasting with Ron Kuby on WABC in the mornings. Curtis [now on at night] and Kuby [now on Air America, I think] were bumped a year or so by Don Imus. Funny how life works---Imus calls the Rutgers womens basketball team "nappy headed hoes", ---and voila----Kuby ends up in radio wasteland. Love Air America, when I can get it, which is not that often. What goes around comes around, even if it you did not start it.

In my neck of conservative NJ, Lonegan won big---and so did Michael Doherty, edging off Mrcia Karrow---a good legislator who was a good critical thinker most of the time. Doherty, however, will join the other right-wingers from out here in the back rows of the NJ Senate.

So, it goes.

New Jersey: Politics Unusual

Redistricting Commission Unveils Twelve New Congressional Districts that All Look Like New Jersey

“…this type of redistricting is much easier in “squarer states like Kansas.”

Cherry Hill Man Believed He Had To Turn The Clocks Back One Hour Each Weekend

“He was always an hour early to every painting job we hired him for.”

New Jersey To Issue Its Own Currency? Springsteen And Sinatra To Appear On New Paper Money.

“My personal favorite for the One Hundred Dollar bill is Joe Piscopo.”

New Jersey Plan to Make Money With Formula One Grand Prix: “Charge Tolls”.

Congressman Leonard Lance Replaced With Evil Twin Right Wing Cousin “Cubby Lance”...

March 1st, 2011: Rep. Jon Runyun beats "Toaster Oven" in Jeopardy! Challenge

February 22, 2011: Gov. Christie to hold “Turn Back The Clock!” Counter-Rally with Republican electeds

Christie issues Executive Order “terminating New York Mets basebal

News shocker: February 17, 2011

AP Newswire Trenton February 4, 2011: New census data: Hispanics the dominant minority group; number 2: Facebook-Americans.

January 24-28, 2011: That Was New Jersey News That Was!

January 24-28, 2011: That Was New Jersey News That Was!

maybe we can call it the Stinker case...". ing, I have to sit next to “Democrats”–––and the president used to many highfalutin’ words. I mean––WTF?”

maybe we can call it the Stinker case...".

Runyan launching an investigation of Obama for refusing to "reveal who is coming from China".

Rivera-Soto Says He'll Abstain Only When The Court Is Divided Due To The ‘Voices’ In His Head

Governor's plan to help Gannett Layoffs: "Create less news...a government about 'nothing'."

December 30th, 2010: News Shocker: New Jersey To Eliminate Offices Of Governor And Lieutenant Governor

Happy Festivus, New Jersey!

December 12, 2010: Sen. Bernie Sanders, Hero Extraordinaire and Mensch of The Year

538 Ways To Live, Work, And Play Like A Liberal

No News Corp Is Good News Corp

9.16.10 New reality show this Fall “Snooki and The Mayor”

New reality show this Fall “Snooki and The Mayor”

Gov. Ted Strickland of Ohio proclaims “Bret Schundler Day”

The Cost of Incompetence

US Department of Education reveals real reason why New Jersey lost “Race to the Top” funding: Gov. Christie was on “steroids”.

Congressman Lance: “yada yada yada… tax cuts… yada yada yada… Republican ‘no’ votes"

Anna Little is now following me on Twitter! And boy, am I excited!

What Their Side Says----

Great way to clean out your basement

At the Right Conference this time.

TV Time

The Week's Best Late-Night Jokes

Take My Mother in Law, Please

Two Guys Talkin' Sports

March 26, 2010 Putz of the Week and Mensch of the Week

Stop screaming. You’ll wake up the neighbors

If you're a local town mayor in New Jersey and you think that screaming about the impact Christie’s budget cuts will have on your town is an issue, it seems that “…screaming too loud during sex can get you or your partner arrested in New Jersey."

March 17th, 2010 The Day New Jersey Stood Still

March 14, 2010 Governor Christie Cuts The Day to Just 23 Hours

A Funny Democrat and a Funny Republican come together for a good cause.

Sarah Palin: Testing the Tea Waters

Trenton News Break:

Where were you when we tried to reach 62?

Antonia Ricigliano cuts her own salary in first act as Edison mayor

'Twas the week before 2010

Coalition of Indicted and Jailed Politcos form Group to Help State

Jersey Officials finally caught up with Ilya the Manatee. Problem: No Beach Tags.

The Hunterdon County Republican Committee met today to choose a Freeholder

Roundin' Up The News 12.2.09

Not Just a Second Banana

Flemingtoon* 11.24.09 *All dialogue mostly guaranteed almost verbatim.

Murray’s Margin of Error

"A Keg tapped at both ends." Well, it's time to tap back.

I Am New Genius

GOP Recruits Serena Williams to Run for Congress After Profane Outburst.

Manners of the Members and the Top Eight Rejected Obama Heckle Response

Wing Man: How I survived three days of Right-Wing peace, love and music.

Read ALL about what happened yesterday!

At RightOnlIne Conference

I Read The News Yesterday, Oh Boy....

Steve Lonegan anti-Cap and Trade Road Show

2009 NJ Powerlessness List

The definition of irony: “an incongruity or discordance between what one says or does.”

And she told the media: ''How about, in honor of the American soldier, you quit makin' things up?''

Landslide District? Slim chance of Changing power.

Bailout of Madoff Not Making Everyone Happy

On the job

The New new New York Yankee Stadium

So, nu? The New Family discusses marriage-equality...

Americans for Prosperity conference

maybe we can call it the Stinker case...".
ing, I have to sit next to “Democrats”–––and the president used to many highfalutin’ words. I mean––WTF?”